What did Dracula say when the witch and the warlock started kissing?" "Get a broom!
What is a jack o lantern's favorite pick up line?
"Darling, you look GOURD-EOUS!!"
What do Italians eat on Halloween?
Fettuccine Afraid-O
I hope these Halloween puns don't drive you batty.
What do you say when you're having dinner with a skeleton? Bone appetit!
What do you get when you divide your jack-o’-lantern’s circumference by its diameter? Pumpkin-Pie!
Why do they put fences around graveyards? Because people are dying to get in!
What do you call a Halloween boner? Petrified wood
Who did Dracula take to the school dance? His ghoul friend.
I said to my son, "There's only one thing about Halloween that scares me."
He asked, "Which is?"
I replied, "Exactly!"
Why do skeleton's make such good comedians? They have so many funny bones.
What do you call Jack-O-Lantern cousins who lift weights together?
Pump Kins
Thank goodness for Halloween, all of a sudden, cobwebs in my house are decorations!
“I found this humerus” is the perfect Halloween pun for boneheads.
What do you get when you drop a pumpkin? Squash.
For Halloween, one of my sons dressed up as the clown from IT, and another son as a Twitter hashtag. They asked me my opinion...
I said "Penny wise, pound foolish"
Which ghost is the best dancer? The Boogie Man!
I need a new Halloween costume. I’m thinking of going as an evil nun.
Do I really need another bad habit?
We’ve all heard of the mushroom who gets invited to the party cause he’s a fungi, but what about the mushroom who stole all the halloween candy?
He had no morrels.
Friend: What are you gonna be for halloween? Me: Drunk!
Ghosts make the best cheerleaders. They have lots of spirit!
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