I hope the only things that blow are candles and balloons. Have a great birthday!
My dad got me a clone of myself for my birthday...
He said “Here, it’s faux you!”
The only gift I got for my birthday was a deck of sticky playing cards.
I’m having a hard time dealing with it.
You know you are getting older when the candles don’t fit on the cake.
More candles means a bigger wish!
Got a universal remote for my Birthday.
Well, this changes everything.
I just bought my friend a mini fridge for his birthday
I can’t wait to see his face light up when he opens it.
The only thing I got for my wife on her birthday was a big helium balloon.
It didn’t go down very well.
What happens when no one comes to your birthday party?
You can have your cake and eat it too.
The only thing I got for my wife on her birthday was a big helium balloon.
It didn’t go down very well.
Looking 50 is great! If you’re 60.
Behind every great parent is a great kid. Happy birthday!
“Dad, why do you always wrap my birthday gifts in this weird fabric?”
Dad: I just wanted to.... make my presents felt.
You feta have a gouda birthday.
What goes up but never comes down? Your age!
They say everything gets better with age.
Happy birthday to someone old enough to go vintage shopping in their own closet.
The girls next door gave me a Rolex for my birthday.
But I think they misunderstood when I said I wanna watch.
You’re not 50 years old, you are 20 years old with 30 years of experience!
My wife isn't talking to me because apparently I ruined her birthday....
I don't know how I did that... I didn't even know it was her birthday!
Being related to me is the best birthday gift you could receive.
I gifted my girlfriend a star for her birthday
I think its perfect, she said she needed some space.
As I handed my dad his 50th birthday card, he looked at me with tears in his eyes and said ....
You know, one would have been enough.
What type of music is scary for birthday balloons? Pop music!
Forget about the past, you can’t change it. Forget about the future, you can’t predict it. Forget about
the present, I didn’t get you one.
For my birthday, my kids got me an alarm clock that swears at you instead of beeping.
That was quite a rude awakening.
You are aged to perfection.
This whole birthday thing is getting old, don’t you think?
What is every horses birthday wish?
A stable economy.
What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday?
AYE, MATEY!
Be careful, too many birthdays can kill you!
What did the Teddy Bear say after blowing out his birthday candles? No cake for me…I’m stuffed
You know you’re getting old when…there is nothing left to learn the hard way.
Why do pieces of popcorn always have great birthdays? Because they’re always popping!
People keep getting me clocks for my birthday.
Time and time again.
What did the boy without hands get for his birthday?
Nobody knows, he hasn't got the package open yet.
For my birthday, my friends gave me a bunch of dirt and sand.
I appreciated the sediment.
I gifted my girlfriend a star for her birthday
I think its perfect, she said she needed some space.
Yo momma so fat...
She can't even fit into her Birthday Suit.
I know birthdays get worse as you get older. But look at the bright side — not too many left now.
For my girlfriend's birthday I got her a dwarfish clown who told jokes...
It wasn't a great gift, but she appreciated the jester.