Which Old Testament prophet took forever to make a point?
“I say… uhhh…” (say it out loud)
What’s the best way to settle church disputes?
With canons.
What is a dentist’s favorite hymn?
Crown Him with Many Crowns
Why is Christmas the cheesiest holiday? Baby cheeses. (Baby Jesus)
What’s the difference between Jesus and pizza?
Jesus can’t be topped.
Why did Noah have to punish the chickens on the Ark?
They were using fowl language.
What car make did the Apostles drive?
Honda… because the apostles were all in one Accord.
What’s a salesman’s favorite Scripture passage?
The Great Commission
How long did Cain hate his brother?
As long as he was Abel.
Who’s the arch-enemy of the Gsus chord?
The Dmin chord.
What kind of egg did the bad chicken lay? A deviled egg!
Need an ark?
I noah guy.
Which servant of God was the worst lawbreaker in the Bible?
Moses. He broke all 10 commandments at once.
At what time of day was Adam created?
A little before Eve.
Where was Solomon’s temple located?
On the side of his head.
Who was the greatest comedian in the Bible?
Samson. He brought the house down.
Who’s the patron saint of poverty?
St. Nickeless.
Who’s the arch-enemy of the Gsus chord?
The Dmin chord.
Why wouldn’t the Pharaoh let the Hebrews go?
He was in ‘de Nile.
Why did Samson try to avoid arguing with Delilah?
He didn’t want to split hairs.
What’s a salesman’s favorite Scripture passage?
The Great Commission
What’s a missionary’s favorite kind of car?
A convertible.
What is a dentist’s favorite hymn?
Crown Him with Many Crowns
Where was Solomon’s temple located?
On the side of his head.
Why did some cardinals get their feathers ruffled?
The Pope gave away the church’s nest egg to the poor.
Why did the hawk sit on the church’s steeple?
It was a bird of pray.
Where is the first baseball game in the Bible?
In the big inning. Eve stole first, Adam stole second. Cain struck out Abel. The Giants and the Angels were rained out.
How does Moses make his coffee?
Hebrews it.
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