Why don’t leprechauns run?
They’d rather jig than jog.
What are the best sandwiches to serve at a St. Patrick’s Day party?
Paddy melts!
My grandma is 80% Irish.
People call her Iris.
What do ghosts drink on St Patricks Day?
BOOs.
Visitors are Doolin over these gorgeous views.
When does a leprechaun cross the road?
Just like everyone - when it's green!
How can Irish people tell when it’s summer?
The rain gets warmer.
Just look, it’s the Trifle Tower
You have me greening from ear to ear.
What type of music should you play at a St. Patrick’s Day party?
Sham-rock!
How was the lepre-con caught?
By an under-clover police officer!
Irish I had better jokes.
What do you say if you lose a game on St. Patrick's Day?
Game clover.
What's Irish and stays out all night?
Paddy O'Furniture.
I am happy that the arrangements for St Patrick's day are going great. The large bottles of green soda look pitcher-perfect.
What do you call a fake Irish stone?
A shamrock.
Irish potatoes are spud-tacular.
Did you hear about the Irish potato that immigrated?
He became a French fry.
I love when you coddle me.
How can you tell if you’ve told a really funny Irish joke?
People will be Dublin over with laughter!
Ireland always leaves me wanting Moher.
It ain’t over till it’s clover.
What kind of spells do leprechauns use?
Lucky Charms!
What kind of person would sell someone a sham-rock?
A lepre-con!
What do you call it when leprechauns get together after being apart?
A wee-union!
In Ireland, I call the shots.
Did you hear Ireland is the fastest-growing country in Europe?
Its population is always Dublin.
I’m Dublin down on what I said before.
Dublin over in laughter.
The food here is quite so-fish-ticated.
Ireland is a little lamb-boyant.
What do you call a bulletproof Irish man?
Rick O’Shay.
I’m a small Irish creature who has been diagnosed with a serious sickness. It’s Leprechronic.
Why are the Irish so concerned about global warming?
They’re really into green living.
Why can’t you borrow money from a leprechaun?
They’re always a little short.
I saw some leprechauns putting coins in the vending machine but in vain. They were using lepre-coins.
You’re the cutest clover in the patch.
Why do people wear shamrocks on St. Patrick's Day?
Real rocks are too heavy.