My wife was just recently diagnosed with colorectal cancer and now has surgery scheduled to remove a couple of inches of her colon. I expect her grammar will improve as a result.
Because she's going to have to learn how to use a semicolon.
What do you say to comfort a grammar teacher?
They’re, there, their.
I violated grammar rules, so I got punished with the death sentence.
Death.
Grammar Nazis for math should be called Fibbonazis.
what do people win at fancy grammar competitions.
a posh trophy.
I was arrested by the grammar police for not using the full stop correctly.
I am now looking at a long sentence.
what do you need to have proper grammar?
a proper grampar.
To get with the times, Grammar Nazi's have changed their name.
They now prefer to go by Alt-writists.
What vehicle does a grammar teacher drive?
A Syllabus.
What do you call a Belgian who's bad at grammar?
An twerp.
How many grammar cops does it take to change a light bulb?
Too.
I hate it when the grammar Nazis single me out.
It seems like a which hunt.
What is Grammar?
The difference between knowing your sh*t, and knowing you're sh*t.
Why didn't the sentence have a period?
Because it was pregnant.
I had my dad proof read an essay of mine back in High School. He said my grammar was a little funny.
Apparently I need to work on my pun-ctuation.
What is a grammar vampire's least favourite drink?
Type-O.
What happened when the semi-colon broke grammar laws?
He was given two consecutive sentences.
Everyone remembers the common hieroglyphics grammar rule...
Eye before flea, except after sea.
In grammar you shouldn’t do double negatives.
It’s a no no.
A bit late but here goes anyway: what do you call the elf who checks Santa's grammar?
A subordinate claus!
How does the Grammar Nazi party fund its government?
Through a syntax.
Grammar has never been my strong suit.
Nothing runs a pun like bad spelling, accept poor grammar's.
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