What do you call Chewbacca when you have chocolate stuck in your hair?
chocolate chip wookiee.
The baby strawberries were berry upset when they heard that both their parents were in the jam.
What do you call a martial arts expert in a tree?
Bruce Leaf.
Why was the broken air conditioner already sad?
Because it couldn’t vent it’s problems.
Why does Foghorn Leghorn take it slow when April rolls around?
Because he’s no spring chicken!
Q: Where do fruits manufacture their money?
A: Peach Mint.
What’s the freshest herb you can find in April?
Spring-thyme!
What do you call a Pharaoh who plays the trumpet? Tootin'khamun.
What kind of pizza do you order on Christmas?
Cheeses Crust.
Not to brag, but I already have a date for Valentines Day.
February 14th.
Do you hear about the pineapple and honeydew who try to get married? The court says that they cant – eloupe.
Did you hear about the generous and kind deer? She had a hart of gold!
What is the best way to communicate with a fish?
Drop it a line!
How does one raindrop ask another out? Water you doing tonight?
What’s green and pecks on trees?
Woody the Wood Pickle.
How much dew does a dewdrop drop
If dewdrops do drop dew?
They do drop, they do
As do dewdrops drop
If dewdrops do drop dew.
Heard about the beaver who can split huge logs with his eyes? Yes, he just saw the logs, and they broke into two.
What to you call a legume with facial hair?
A mustachio!
What's the difference between an otter and a navy aircrewman?
At least the otter knows he's not a seal.
Why wasn’t the pig chosen in the football/soccer team?
It was a ball hogger.
"I would make a skeleton joke, but you wouldn't find it very
humerus."
Knife and a fork bottle and a cork
that is the way you spell New York.
Chicken in the car and the car can go,
that is the way you spell Chicago.
Did you hear about the scientist that studied nectarines? He won the Nobel Peach Prize.
Who did all this shopping? Me, my elf, and I!
The retiring orchard gardener made a farewell peach that was really heart-warming.
I nearly kicked my dog out, but we renegotiated the terms of his leash.
Where do bats keep their money?
The blood bank.
What’s the best time for Frankenstein to go to a party?
Fright now.
What do you call it when you order the same donut every day?
A do-rut!
What do you call a bear with no teeth?
Gummy Bear.
What's the only tea an Englishman can't stand?
Humidity.
How does a koala get from one place to another? On a gondkoala.
What do trees drink at their parties? Root beer.
The most useless room in a ghost's home in the living room.
I can heartly wait to see you.
How did the catholic cowboy greet his priest for confession?
“Howdy, pardoner!”
All the other vegetables have always felt very emotional whenever they are near the onion.
Did you hear about the rabbit who refused to leave her house? She was having a bad hare day.
When I proposed to my fiancee, she started crying. It must be because I proposed to her with an onion ring.
Overheard on a bus... What do you call a social hermit crab?
Just a crab.
What do you call an edible ion?
An onion
When you see something red that goes up and down, chances are it is a strawberry in an elevator.
Where did the milk write everything about her life? In her dairy.
What kind of test do chemistry students like best?
Mole-tiple choice
I love you and I ain’t lion.
“PMS jokes aren’t funny; period.”
Why did the tiger eat the tightrope walker?
It wanted a balanced diet.
How did the Mother Banana spoil the Baby Banana? She left him out in the sun too long.
The best gift I ever got was a broken drum...
You can't beat it.
Why does no one react when the Queen farts?
Because it’s a Noble Gas!