Remember, Irish puns on St. Patrick's Day don't just shame you. They Seamus all.
Why can’t you borrow money from a leprechaun?
They’re always a little short.
I am happy that the arrangements for St Patrick's day are going great. The large bottles of green soda look pitcher-perfect.
Why are the Irish so concerned about global warming?
They’re really into green living.
Did you hear about the Irishman that drank 100 liters of stout in just 30 minutes?
They’re calling it a Guinness World Record.
My grandma is 80% Irish.
People call her Iris.
In Ireland, when the cows are in the road it’s udder chaos.
I love when you coddle me.
What is it called when two Irish couples go out on a date?
Dublin.
Just look, it’s the Trifle Tower
The food here is quite so-fish-ticated.
Ireland is a little lamb-boyant.
Visitors are Doolin over these gorgeous views.
Did you hear Ireland is the fastest-growing country in Europe?
Its population is always Dublin.
Why shouldn’t you iron a four-leaved clover?
You don’t want to press your luck.
I’m Dublin down on what I said before.
Why did Saint Patrick drive the snakes out of Ireland?
They were causing mass hiss-teria!
In Ireland, I call the shots.
Are people jealous of the Irish?
Yeah, they’re green with envy.
Jameson on St. Patrick’s Day? It’s worth a shot.
A trip to Ireland always lifts my spirits.
I saw some leprechauns putting coins in the vending machine but in vain. They were using lepre-coins.
You’re the cutest clover in the patch.
What do you call it when leprechauns get together after being apart?
A wee-union!
Ireland is pitcher perfect.
I’m a clover, not a fighter.
Why don’t leprechauns run?
They’d rather jig than jog.
Dublin over in laughter.
How does every Irish joke start?
By looking over your shoulder.
What do you call a bulletproof Irish man?
Rick O’Shay.
How can Irish people tell when it’s summer?
The rain gets warmer.
Irish food is legen-dairy.
You have me greening from ear to ear.
March 17 is near, and I am so excited about it. The clover it gets, the more excited I become.
What do you say if you lose a game on St. Patrick's Day?
Game clover.
Why did the two Irish men fight amongst themselves?
They can’t find any other worthy opponents.
What are the best sandwiches to serve at a St. Patrick’s Day party?
Paddy melts!
How was the lepre-con caught?
By an under-clover police officer!
When I went to my favorite Irish cafe after years, I felt deja brew all over again.
I’m a small Irish creature who has been diagnosed with a serious sickness. It’s Leprechronic.
Irish I had better jokes.
What kind of person would sell someone a sham-rock?
A lepre-con!
Don’t worry, Moher pictures are coming.
What do you call a big Irish spider?
A Paddy long legs.
Ireland always leaves me wanting Moher.
Why did St. Patrick drive the snakes out of Ireland?
It was too expensive to fly and too long to walk.
I told my friend that our old school friend is coming to attend St Patrick's feast. She was surprised. She asked, "O'Reilly?"
Be-leaf me, you look great in green.
Irish potatoes are spud-tacular.
I’m feelin’ green.