Enjoy goblin up all your Halloween candy — just don't let it go to waist!
Who did Dracula take to the school dance? His ghoul friend.
For Halloween I’m going to write “Life” on a plain white T-shirt and hand out lemons to strangers
I hope these Halloween puns don't drive you batty.
I said to my son, "There's only one thing about Halloween that scares me."
He asked, "Which is?"
I replied, "Exactly!"
My aunt showed up to our Halloween party wearing ranch bottle costume. She was an hour late.
Her response: Sorry, I was getting dressed.
Friend: What are you gonna be for halloween? Me: Drunk!
I don't trust pumpkins. They're seedy.
Did you hear about the train that dressed up for Halloween?
It became a fright train.
We’ve all heard of the mushroom who gets invited to the party cause he’s a fungi, but what about the mushroom who stole all the halloween candy?
He had no morrels.
I dressed up as bacon for halloween.
To say the least, i was looking pretty CRISP.
What do you get when you drop a pumpkin? Squash.
Did you guys hear about the airplane that dressed up for Halloween?
It was in disguise.
Did you get to meet the tallest vampire in the world? People call him Count Everest.
I was a bit worried about making breakfast on Halloween
But I ain't afraid of no toast.
Halloween Math
What do you get if you divide the circumference of a jack-o'-lantern by its diameter?
Pumpkin Pi.
What’s a monsters favorite desert? I-Scream!
On Halloween, I will be wearing a normal everyday T-Shirt
I'll be going as a Casualty
My Haloween costume would have been perfect if my hair agreed with me. Guess I’m just having a bad scare day.
I went to a Halloween party wearing a pie shell and carrying a shepherds crook.
"What on earth are you supposed to be?" "I'm a spy" "A spy?. What kinda of spy wears a pie costume and carries a crook?"
A shepherds spy.
This Halloween, the only Candy I’m interersted in swings from a pole and has daddy issues