I hate when I have to stop scuba diving
If makes me deep-pressed
Why did the blonde skier only wear one boot?
Channel 7's weatherman said there was a 50% chance of snow.
I’ve been getting blitzed all game
Where do ski instructors keep their money?
In the local snow bank.
Did Cyclops the X-man play hockey? Yes, he enjoyed lasing up the skates.
Did you hear about the Heisman Trophy candidate who falsified his rushing stats?
The yards were stacked in his favor!
Why did the volleyball player get thrown out of the party? He spiked the punch.
Why did the baseball batter go crazy?
Because the pitcher only threw scewballs.
It feels great to hit the ball again. It spin a long time.
What did the fishermen say to the fish that swam away? "You bass-tard!"
I’m a baseliner and I don’t know how to volley: my game would disappear if I went to no-man’s land.
What did one hillbilly say to another? I got a new fly rod and reel for my wife. Best trade I ever made.
How does a volleyball team welcome their new neighbors? With a block party.
As a Brit, I can't get into American football
They rugby the wrong way.
Which LA King was the total package? Parcel Dionne.
I’m never board when I’m at the pool.
This event is sure to be out of bounds.
How do recreational league baseball players stay so cool?
They sit among their fans.
Why were the volleyball players always tying in tic tac toe? Each time one of them sets an X, the other player just says O.
[Beer] This is my number one draft pick.
I could go on and on about Salming but I don't want to Borje.
Why do blind people hate diving?
It scares the hell out of their dogs.
I tried to start a soccer club so I put up some posters on a local bulletin board.
Just to get the ball rolling.
The winning home run didn't surprise the hitter. He did it all without batting an eye.The baseball player loved his treadmill and all the home runs.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Eyesore.
​Eyesore who?
Eyesore from my long run—can we take the elevator?
Why do volleyball players join the military? They want to gain extra experience in the service.
What game do some skiers like to play on the road trip to the slopes?
Ice Spy With My Little Ice.
This pool is impressive. Or should I say swim-pressive?
Why don't orphans make good baseball players?
Because they don't know where home is.
Why did the baseball team recruit a tiny ghost?
Because they needed a little team spirit.
Their soccer team and the US navy had one thing in common, they both spent over $50 million on a sub.
I started watching soccer because I could see it’s very relevant to my life.
Little to no goals.
Calm before the score
Scrambled eggs are similar to a losing basketball team because both are beaten.
What type of pool do mechanics like best?
The car pool!
What do fish and women have in common? They both stop shaking their tale after you catch them!
How do you communicate with a fish? Drop it a line!
The perfect description of a bowling game is one where there is plenty of room at the top, but no room to lie down.
Golfer: I’d move heaven and earth to break 100 on this course.
Caddie: Try heaven. You’ve already moved most of the earth.
I’m icing the kicker – and by kicker, I mean beer.
Where do sperm play football?
In a con-dome.
At the end of the year, there is always a rock n’ bowl concert where everyone gets entertained.
Which classical Greek may have actually invented baseball?
Homer.
My favorite sport is bowling cause I always strike out with girls.
What do frogs do when they ski?
They rip it.
My girlfriend told me she's breaking up with me because of my football obsession.
I told her she'll need to wait till the summer window if she wants a free transfer.
Do you know why an octopus is so good at Football?
It gets ten tackles a play.
Brother: "I saw a seahorse scuba diving"
Dad: "Wow that's amazing, I didn't realise they had the technology."
Why can't Bill Clinton go scuba diving?
He won't inhale.
There are many grounds religious children can practice their soccer skills. However, most of them love the prayground.