I just watched Sunday Night Football.
There were Lutz and Lutz of field goals.
[Beer] This is my number one draft pick.
I’ve never lost a game of football basketball or volleyball!
Though I’ve never played a game either.
What’s a Movers favorite football team?
The Packers!
What do you call a boat full of polite football players?
A good sportsman ship
What do you do if a running back swallows the football?
You have to get him to cough it up!
Why’s it always hot after a football game?
All the fans left.
Kicking off the afternoon in the best way possible
I may not be the biggest football fan, but I love tight ends.
Why was the football pitch a triangle?
Because someone took a corner
My girlfriend told me she's breaking up with me because of my football obsession.
I told her she'll need to wait till the summer window if she wants a free transfer.
What did the foot say to the football?
I toed you.
What kind of insect is bad at football?
A fumble-bee.
I made a snap decision to watch football today
I’ve been getting blitzed all game.
Which football playoff team are Star Trek fans rooting for ?
The Green Bay Picards.
Staying humble thanks to that fumble
[Donuts] We’re going the hole nine yards for this game.
Football is one habit I will never kick
[Drink] That’s a thirst down!
We’ll kickoff the party with some cocktails.
Where do sperm play football?
In a con-dome.
What must the Oregon football team do before each play?
Get all of their ducks in a row.
What happened when the football coach’s dog ran onto the field during a game?
He got called for ineligible retriever down field!
Why couldn't the skeleton play football?
He didn't have the guts.
A knife tried out for Varsity football.
It didn't make the cut.
Do you know why an octopus is so good at Football?
It gets ten tackles a play.
What do you call it when a football player suffers a career-ending injury in his last game before retirement? Gridirony!
Don’t drop the ball – without you, the party will be incomplete.
We’ll have a ball.
Hope you’re wide open on [date].
Don’t pass on this party – rush on over.
Why was McGruff the Crime Dog ejected from the football game?
He was called for unnecessary gruffness!
Why did the quarterback suddenly walk off the field?
The coach told him to take a hike!
Why couldn't the warden decide whether to allow the prison football team play the professional football team?
The idea had its pros and cons.
I like your tight end
What do you call a Spanish football player with no legs?
Gracias.
What’s the difference between a punter and punster?
A punster gets his kicks with bad puns like these!
Beauty is only pig skin deep
[Chicken] We’re serving this during the game, so you might call it a live ball fowl.
Give me some pigskin
Did you hear that Notre Dame gave up four interceptions last week?
Knute Rockne would turnover in his grave!
I had a really good fantasy football team.
Then, My Luck ran out.
I went to Oxford University, where I was a philosophy major and the starting goalkeeper on the football team.
They called me Soccertes.
Here’s the game plan: [party details]
With salsa, cheese dip, and guac, our bowl game is hot.
A goal new ball game I he a kick outta you
Did you hear about the Heisman Trophy candidate who falsified his rushing stats?
The yards were stacked in his favor!
Did you hear about the fumbled exorcism? The guy retained possession!
What is a bird that flies over a football field called?
A fieldgull.
[Food Spread] This is the line of scrumptiousness.