My dad hates the ocean, but the other day he bought a boat.
He never could resist a good sail.
Have you heard about the restaurant that caters exclusively to dolphins?
It only has one customer, but at least it serves a porpoise.
Why are seabirds so lucky in love?
Because one good tern always deserves another.
Why did the fisherman suddenly redirect his boat?
Just for the halibut.
Do you know what would happen when you throw a Finnish sailor into the ocean?
Helsinki.
Where does a killer whale go for braces?
The orca-dontist.
Did you hear about the lawyer who tried to sue a shark for biting all his limbs off?
He didn’t have a leg to stand on.
What did the Ocean say to the shore?
Nothing. It just waved.
Why are there fish at the bottom of the sea?
Because they dropped out of school.
What did the sarcastic otter say?
I think you’ve confused me with someone who builds a dam.
What did the tuna say to her overzealous partner?
I think we need to scale things back here.
Why does the mermaid wear seashells?
Because she grew out of her B-shells.
What did the lobsterman say when his crate turned up empty?
It a-piers we have a problem.
What’s a cetacean’s favorite TV show?
Whale of Fortune.
I was trying to look at a picture of the ocean but kept having to reload the page, it finally worked after 5 attempts.
That was refreshing to sea.
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck.
What drug is illegal in the ocean
Sea weed
My friend asked me how big the ocean is.
I said "can you be more Pacific?"
Why don’t clams give to charity?
Because they’re shellfish!
Are you addicted to the ocean and ocean life?
If you are, sea kelp
What did the carp say to his crush?
Don’t play koi with me!
What do baleen whales call a hook-up?
Netflix and krill.
Where does seaweed look for a job?
In the kelp-wanted section.
What did one tidepool say to the other tidepool?
Show me your mussels!
Why is the ocean so salty?
Because the land never waves back.
What does the fish say when she disagrees with her husband?
I don’t quite sea it that way.
I went fishing in the ocean the other day and caught one fish
but I think it was just a fluke.
Why Did the Whale Cross the Ocean?
To get to the other tide.
Why is the ocean always blue?
Because the shore never waves back.
I wanted make a joke about the ocean, but it's too deep
What did the ocean say when asked if he wanted to be friends with the beach?
“Shore!”