Why was the sedimentary rock so cheap? It was always on shale.
Why did the tectonic plates break up? It wasn’t her fault, but there was just too much friction between them.
What did the boy volcano say to the girl volcano? I really lava you!
This rock was magma before it was cool.
Get it?
Bill’s house was rocking last night, everyone got stoned.
Too bad Bill didn’t have avalanche insurance.
What type of fruit includes Barium and double Sodium? BaNaNa.
What is black, purple, blue, yellow and white? Sugilite, sardonyx and opal all fighting over a gumball.
What do rocks eat?
Pom-a-granites.
What do you call a periodic table when the gold is missing? Au revoir.
What do you call a periodic table when the gold is missing?
Au revoir.
What is black, purple, blue, yellow and white?
Sugilite, sardonyx and opal all fighting over a gumball.
You want to hear the best rock puns? Give me a moment and I’ll dig something up.
Why was the sedimentary rock extra cheap?
Because it was on shale.
What is the the chemical formulation for candy molecules? Carbon, Holmium, Cobalt, Lanthanum, Tellerium—or ChoCoLaTe.
Why are mountains not just funny? Because they are hilarious.
What did the metamorphic rock say during the test?
This is too much pressure!
What do you call a benzene ring where the iron atoms replacing all of the carbon atoms? A ferrous wheel.
Where do rocks like to sleep?
In bedrocks!
What happens if someone chucks a rock at you? You hit the rock’s bottom.
What did the bartender say when he saw oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium and phosphorous enter his barroom? OH SnaP!
Why is the world so diverse?
Because it contains alkynes of people.
Rock was magma before it was cool.
Watson: Sherlock, what type of rock is this amazing specimen?
Holmes: It’s sedimentary, my dear Watson.
If H20 is water, then what is H204? It’s for drinking, washing and swimming, of course!
Why are geologists great dates?
They can make your bedrock.
What type of weapon can you make with potassium, iron and nickel? A KniFe.
I really hate rock puns.
My sediments exactly.
What did the diamond say to its friend copper? Nothing, silly, minerals don’t talc!
What did the boy volcano say to the girl volcano?
I really lava you!
What is the difference between a chemist and a geologist? While a geologist will drink anything fermented, a chemist just
drinks anything that is distilled.
Why did the toddler chew on pebbles? He wanted to eat rock candy.
Why was the sedimentary rock so cheap?
It was always on shale.
Where do rocks like to sleep? In bedrocks!
Have a gneiss day! This is one of the simplest rock puns, but it is certainly a gneiss way to start your day out right!
What happens when you blend sulfur, tungsten and silver together? SWAG.
Why can’t minerals ever lie?
They’re always in their pure form.
Why can’t minerals ever lie? They’re always in their pure form.
They consider a million years ago to be Recent.
What do you call a rock that never goes to school? A skipping stone!
What do you call a rock that never goes to school?
A skipping stone!
What did the gold say to the pyrite?
You’re a fool and a fake!
Did you want to hear the joke about the mountain? Never mind, you would never get over it.
What kind of magazine does a rock like to read?
Rolling Stone.
What happens when you keep reading geology jokes in your free time? You know that you have really hit rock bottom.
Why is the world so diverse? Because it contains alkynes of people.
You want to hear the best rock puns?
Give me a moment and I’ll dig something up.
Did you hear about the metamorphosis professor who just gave up on life? He really needed a change.
What do you call a can of pop found in a conglomerate?
Coca-Cola Clastic.
What element comes from Norse mythology? Thorium.
What did the teenage rock say after failing its drive test? I don’t want to talc about it.