Why doesn’t Frankenstein go on airplanes?
He can’t get past the airport metal detector.
How did Frankenstein know Jesus was coming for a visit?
He used his frankincense.
How does Frankenstein jump-start his day?
With a shock of lighting.
Why did Frankenstein’s monster go to a psychiatrist?
He thought he had a screw loose.
Why is Frankenstein such good fun?
Because he soon has you in stitches.
Who brings the monsters their babies?
Frankenstork.
Why was Frankenstein’s monster always being arrested?
He was so easy to charge.
Where does a thrifty Frankenstein get his limbs?
At the second-hand store.
Why didn’t Dr. Frankenstein ever make a second monster?
Because he just didn’t have the guts to do it again.
What’s Frankenstein’s favorite food?
Frankenfurters.
What is Dr. Frankenstein’s favorite part of a company?
Human resources.
Which musical group did Frankenstein not like at all?
The Village People.
Dr. Frankenstein just placed an order on Amazon.
It wasn't expensive, but I imagine the shipping cost him an arm and a leg.
Why did Dr. Frankenstein hire Igor as his assistant?
He had a hunch about him.
What did Dr. Frankenstein say when Pinocchio’s nose grew?
IT’S A LIEEEEE!!
What did Frankenstein say when he was struck by lightning?
Great! A jolt to the bolt!
Why did Frankenstein tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
He didn’t want to wake the sleeping pills!
What do you call the Frankenstein of the Gardening world?
An A-botan-ation.
Did you know Doctor Frankenstein used to be a lonely, lonely man?
Then he learned how to make friends.
What did Dr.Frankenstein say when his monster spat on him?
It’s saliva!
Was there a spark between Frankenstein and his bride?
Yes, he simply couldn’t resistor.
I love making new friends.
That’s why I studied under Dr. Frankenstein.
Who will Frankenstein’s monster take to the dance?
Any old girl he can dig up.
People say Frankenstein’s monster had a temper…
But actually he was surprisingly level-headed.
Who did Frankenstein take to the prom?
His ghoul friend.
Why did Frankenstein’s monster give up boxing?
Because he didn’t want to spoil his looks.
Frankenstein entered a body-building competition…
And soon found he had seriously misunderstood the objective.
What is Frankenstein’s favorite cheese?
Muenster.
Sad to hear that Baron von Frankenstein has given up on his dream of being an actor.
He couldn’t get the parts.
How does Frankenstein eat his dinner?
He bolts it down.
We all know Albert Einstein was a genius…
But his brother Frank was a monster.
What monster plays the most April Fool’s jokes?
Prankenstein!
People keep asking me why I’m working for Dr. Frankenstein.
I’m just trying to make a living.
What was the inscription on the tomb of Frankenstein’s monster?
HERE LIES FRANKENSTEIN’S MONSTER. MAY HE REST IN PIECES.
How do you know Frankenstein is tired?
He’s dead on his feet.
What is Frankenstein’s favorite cheese?
Muenster.
Why is Frankenstein always asking for help?
He’s looking for someone to give him a hand.
What happened when Dr. Frankenstein swallowed some uranium?
He got atomic ache.
What kind of dog did Frankenstein want for Christmas?
A lab.
What tree monster prowls the forest?
Frankenpine.
What’s the best time for Frankenstein to go to a party?
Fright now.
Why did Frankenstein turn to solar?
For the free charge.
Dr. Frankenstein must have been pretty buff.
He was a bodybuilder, after all.
How does Frankenstein speak?
Frankly.
Frankenstein’s monster was really worried one day.
“Pull yourself together”, said Frankenstein.
How did Dr. Frankenstein pay the men who built his monster?
On a piece rate.
What do you call a clever monster?
Frank Einstein.
What should you do when you see Frankenstein walking towards you?
Make a bolt for it.
Dr. Frankenstein: Igor, have you seen my latest invention? It’s a new pill consisting of 50 percent glue and 50 percent aspirin.
Igor: But what is it for?
Dr. Frankenstein: For monsters with splitting headaches.
What happened when the ice monster had a furious row with Frankenstein?
He gave him the cold shoulder!