I have faith in Pfizer and its Covid vaccine, because they also make Viagra.
If Pfizer can raise the dead, it can save the living.
Hey kids! I went back in time and formed a British 80s pop group called The Vaccine!
And now The Cure is no longer necessary!
Did you guys hear about that 14-year old virgin girl who got pregnant after receiving the flu vaccine?
Sounds like an inoculate conception.
I created a vaccine for apathy, but unfortunately no one seems interested.
You know what it's called when you hurry to develop a vaccine?
... Russian.
I can't imagine the stress put on the workers in trying to figure out the newest flu vaccine...
It probably puts a strain on the staff.
My wife asked, “If someone’s body just isn’t fighting the virus, would getting the vaccine help?”
I told her I think it’s worth a shot.
If Russia wants to be the first country to produce a vaccine ...
... Then Soviet.
Heard Russia has the vaccine to Coronavirus. I'm probably not Putin that into my body.
Dolly Parton partially funded Moderna's COVID Vaccine.
It comes in two very large dosey-doses.
The Covid-19 vaccine should be tested on politicians first...
If they survive, the vaccine is safe.
If they don't, the country is safe.
Why do anti vaxxers hate vaccine jokes?
They never get them.
There's now a vaccine to make you better at geometry.
It's called Pythagorean Serum.
With all the talk of the pandemic and vaccines recently, I decided to consult a micro-biologist.
I thought they'd be smaller.
My vaccine dad joke failed.
But it was worth a shot.
What did Russian do after they made the vaccine ?
They Put-in.
What do you call doctors who make vaccines for the flu?
Flu-Fighters.
I heard the government is going to put chips inside people with Covid vaccines...
I hope I get Doritos.
I hear there's a new COVID-19 vaccine delivered via an audio interface as music.
It is hoped that this will lead to heard immunity.
I heard Frozen University is banning anyone who got the COVID vaccine from returning for the spring quarter
I guess if you get vaccinated you won’t be headed to the ICU.
Why did the Russian vaccine cross the road?
To get to the other side effects.
If this new covid vaccine works...
...It'll be a real shot in the arm for 2021.
Using vaccines is...
Antibody-building.
Don’t expect to hear yourself urinate after taking the Pfizer vaccine.
I had a doctor tell me the P was silent.