I highly encourage you to have more brain farts
It develops mental fartitude.
What did the mother brain say to her oldest child when it was bothering her youngest child?
It didn't want to get brain-washed.
Why do action potentials make good volleyball players?
They are always spiking.
Why is the left cerebral cortex always wrong?
Because it was never in the rgiht.
My hypochondriac brother just told me he thinks he's got a brain tumor.
I told him not to worry, it's probably all in his head.
What do you call glia when it is happy?
Smyelin.
What do you get when you cross a thought with a light bulb?
A bright idea.
If your dog was a neurologist, what would it do all day?
Perform PET scans.
A friend of mine lost the right side of of his brain in a car accident, but he wouldn’t stop drinking and driving.
No one in their right mind would do that.
The brain is an amazing organ
it really makes you think.
A brain aneurysm would be swell.
Why were the axons bothered by myelin?
It was getting on their nerves.
What is a brain's favorite kind of boat?
A cranial blood vessel.
What street does the hippocampus live on?
Memory lane.
Why didn't the brain want to take a bath?
What is a neuroscientist's favorite type of dog?
A labratory retriever.
What do neurons do on their birthdays?
They cell-ebrate
What did the Hollywood film director say to the young neuron that wanted to be an actor?
"Hey kid, you've got potential."
Why are neuroanatomy classes the smartest?
They have lots of brains.
What is a neuron's favorite television channel?
The Ion Channel
There's a microchip you can transplant into your brain to boost your memory
You should keep that in mind.
I had a dream I was looking for my brain
But it was all in my head.
What happens when you anger a brain surgeon?
They will give you a piece of your mind.
What do you call the shirt a neurosurgeon wears to every brain surgery?
His specialty.
The real reason humans have wrinkly brains?
We've been in the gene pool too long.
I didn't want to have brain surgery but I had to.
I guess it changed my mind.
Where do brains go for vacation in Massachusetts?
Braintree, MA
What part of the brain deals with knowledge about plants?
The treefrontal cortex.
What happens when a neurotransmitter falls in love with a receptor?
You get a binding relationship.
Did you know that a Squid’s esophagus goes through its brain?
Food for thought, isn’t it?
What did the right hemisphere say to the left hemisphere when they could not agree on anything?
Let's split.
What are the magic words for a brainy magician?
Hocus sulcus.
Why did the brain go into a group of trees to sleep?
For rest. (forest)
Why does the spinal cord belong in the brass section of an orchestra?
Because of its dorsal and ventral horns.
What happens if you break the brain scanner?
If some of Fred Flintstone's neurotransmitters could talk, what would they say?
"Gaba-Daba-Do!"
Where does a neuron keep its money?
In a brain bank.
I was doing brain surgery to a patient the other day
He was rather open-minded if you ask me.
What does a zombie say as he squishes your brains between his fingers?
Got your knows.
Why were the two retinas such good friends?
They always saw eye-to-eye.
What do you call a group of brains who form a singing group at school?
A glia club.
Where does a brain go on vacation?
To a hippo camp us.
Did you know there's a college in the brain for hippopotami?
It's called the Hippocampus.
Why can't a brain be 12 inches long?
Becuase then it would be a foot.
Why do neurons like e-mail?
The love messages.
Why was the neuron sent to the principal's office?
It had trouble controlling its impulses.
Why did the action potential cross the optic chiasm?
To get to the other side.
What did the hippocampus say during its retirement speech?
"Thanks for the memories."
Keeping tropical fish in your home has a calming effect on the brain
because of the indoor fins.
What did parietal say to frontal?
"I lobe you."
Why did the neuron like to sleep in the top bunk bed?
It wanted to have a high resting potential.