Uni-corn? I though that’s what you call a single grain or maize.
I love you so fairy much.
Why do gnomes laugh when they play football?
Because the grass tickles their armpits.
Someone stole my lawn gnome that was under my porch!
Who would stoop so low?
What do you call a connection between two points in space-time through which only dragons can pass?
A wyrmhole.
What do you call an elf that joins the 11 other elves in Santa’s workshop?
The twelf!
What sound does a gnome make when he's eating dinner?
Gnome-gnome-gnom-gnom-gnom-nom-nom!
What do mermaids wash their fins with?
Tide.
Why did some of the elves spell Christmas as N-O-E? Because Santa said No L!
Why did the rude unicorn not say hello to the other? Because while the pace (face) was familiar, he
just couldn’t remember the mane (name).
What do gnomes love to sing while gardening?
Gnome Worry, Bee Happy.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Gnome.
Gnome who?
Gnome sweet gnome.
What's a dragon's favorite snack?
Fire Crackers!
What goes inside elves’ pointy shoes?
Their mistletoes.
Six out of seven dwarfs aren’t Happy.
Did you hear about the misbehaving unicorn? Sure, but I never though that these creatures could get so horny.
What do you call a dwarf who sells prosthetic limbs?
A small arms dealer.
A dragon would never explode
But a dino might.
What's worse than a dragon speaking to you?
The money that you have to pay for therapy.
I have a bone to pixie with you.
What is the little mermaid’s favorite font?
Arial.
Why does the fairy kingdom smell so awful?
Because of all the toad stools.
You are shrimply the best!
If man’s bet friend is a dog, would a unicorns best friend be a corn dog?
Elves usually make fantastic listeners since they happen to be all ears.
Why are dragons such good story tellers?
Because they have long tails.
Did you hear about the elf that quit Santa's workshop?
He was a rebel without a Claus.
The ocean doesn't like to say hello, it just waves.
What did the unicorn tell the bag of beans? U-no-corn.
Why can't mermaids use the letters A or B?
They only know what's below C level.
What do elves eat for breakfast?
Snowflakes!
Wish upon a starfish.
The seaweed is always greener in somebody else's lake!
Why does the little mermaid wear sea shells?
Cause B-shells are too small, and D- shells are too big.
Did you hear about the elf who was a little hard of hearing?
She had to keep saying "Sleigh, what?"
What do you call a philosophical fairy?
Thinker-bell.
What kind of bread do elves use to make sandwiches?
Why shortbread of course!
What do spiritual gnomes say when doing yoga? Gnom-aste.
Have you ever seen a baby dragon eating ice cream?
It'll melt your heart.
What type of elf has the most books?
A bookshelf.
Who did all this shopping? Me, my elf, and I!
What did the witness say at the gnome trial? In my gnome words here’s what happened.
Why shouldn't you feed elves shellfish?
It makes them crabby!
What did the elf tell its friends when they were traveling?
"Let’s take an elfie."
What's the difference between a person that just won the lottery and a fairy in salt water?
One is tickled pink, the other is a pickled Tink.
Would you call a hardy unicorn that survived disease an immunicorn?
You mermaid to go far.
What kind of sandwich does Kissy the Elf like for lunch?
A wrap!
When it comes to mermaids growing legs, it's all in the de-tail.
What do gnomes use to guard their mazes?
Minitaurs.