Hey baby, you know what sounds good? You and me never speaking to each other again.
Hey, baby. I'm calling myself Han because you need to be Solo.
Honey if I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put the letters "DON'T LOVE" in between I and U
Roses are red
And you gotta go
Because I found out
That you is a ho.
We need to cover more ground so we should split up.
It's not you...it's your taste in music.
It’s a good thing we’re bad at puzzles because there is no way we’re putting this shit back together.
Wanna see a magic trick? Abrakadabra, you're single now.
Hey babe do you need crutches? Cause I can’t stand you anymore.
Are you an astronaut? Because I need some space.
Hey, are you an anchor? Because you've done nothing but weigh me down.
Did we fall from the sky? Because we look pretty broken up right now.
Do those legs go all the way? Because you should use them to go away.
Damn girl, are you a magician’s assistant? Because I want you to disappear from my life.
Honey, I need you to cancel my subscription. I’m done with your issues.
What does a deer hang on its Christmas tree?
“Horn – aments.”
I’d better get a library card, because I’m checking out of this relationship.
I think we need to become better strangers.
There's something I've been wanting to say since the day we met. Goodbye.
Remember when I asked you out? Well, I was talking to the girl behind you.
I think we need to become better strangers.
Are you a dollar bill? Because you’re single.
Girl you're looking like a snack and I'm going on a diet.
This relationship is kinda like the Superbowl LIII halftime show; I can’t wait for it to be over.
Hey, babe. I think it's time we take our relationship to the previous level.
It’s not you – it’s me. I don’t like you anymore.
Hey, remember back when we were a thing… Yeah… Good times.
Hey girl, are you a newspaper?
Because there's a new issue with you every f**king day.
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put I at the beginning and U at the end.
You looked better when I was drunk.
Are you the dog? Because your shit’s all over the lawn.
"It's not me, it's you!"
I think it would be hot if we f**ked other people. Exclusively.
I'm not gay but I'll learn.
Whoa, Heaven must be missing an angel! Because you’re dead to me.
Will you be the sun in my life? Then stay millions of miles away from me.
I think this has been said somewhere else.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
But I don't care
Cause I'm leaving you.
Hey baby are you American cheese because you come as a single now.
Knock knock. Who's there? You're - You're who? - You're single!
Dinosaurs represent our relationship, because they both don’t exist anymore.”
We must be a cast on a spiral fracture, girl. Because we’re on a serious break.
What did the weather reporter say to his wife?
“I hope it doesn’t rain, deer!”
Are you a New Years resolution? Because we stopped working out after the first two weeks
Hey girl, you must be a math book because you’re full of problems.
Aside from being single, what do you do for a living?
You are so right. And I am so left.
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