I will always cherish my initial misconceptions of you.
Hey babe, are you the Mcdonald's Ice Cream Machine, because you just aren't working for me anymore.
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put I at the beginning and U at the end.
Let’s make like a banana and split.
Dang girl, are you an angel? Because you are dead to me.
Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: you.
Are you the dog? Because your shit’s all over the lawn.
I don’t know what I’d do without you, but starting tomorrow I’m going to give it a try.
I think we need to become better strangers.
Dinosaurs represent our relationship, because they both don’t exist anymore.”
Knock knock. Who's there? You're - You're who? - You're single!
This relationship is kinda like the Superbowl LIII halftime show; I can’t wait for it to be over.
Wanna see a magic trick? Abrakadabra, you're single now.
They say one man's trash is another man's treasure. I hope you find someone who treasures you.
Are you a fire alarm? because you are really freaking loud and annoying
Do those legs go all the way? Because you should use them to go away.
Hey girl, you must be a math book because you’re full of problems.
Raise your hand if you have a boyfriend.
Not so fast
What did the weather reporter say to his wife?
“I hope it doesn’t rain, deer!”
What does a deer hang on its Christmas tree?
“Horn – aments.”
Do you happen to know sign language? Because this is the last time you’ll hear from me.
Hey babe do you need crutches? Cause I can’t stand you anymore.
Hey baby, are you in a tunnel? Because we’re breaking up.
Hey, did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because honestly, Karen, you are a demon.
Are you a fidget spinner? Because the last time I had fun with you was forever ago and I’m not really interested in touching you anymore. I’m pretty sure you were just a phase and now I’d really like to get you out of my house and forget it ever happened.
You are so right. And I am so left.
Hey, babe. I think it's time we take our relationship to the previous level.
Remember when I asked you out? Well, I was talking to the girl behind you.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
My divorce attorney
Our relationship is like my financial status: Broke.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
But I don't care
Cause I'm leaving you.
It's time to be like a kit-kat and split up.
Are you an astronaut? Because I need some space.
Hey Pumpkin, I just wanted to say that I'm done with having Halloween every day.
"It's not me, it's you!"
Hey baby, you know what sounds good? You and me never speaking to each other again.
The Best Break Up Lines
Want to know a joke? Our relationship.
Girl you're looking like a snack and I'm going on a diet.
Here, look at this blank piece of paper for a second… I wrote every reason why we should stick together on it.
Are you a parking ticket? Because you're evidence that I made a mistake.
There's something I've been wanting to say since the day we met. Goodbye.
We need to cover more ground so we should split up.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I'd rather be dead than continue seeing you!
We should make like your parents and split.
Whoa, Heaven must be missing an angel! Because you’re dead to me.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
You made my life a mess
Please call a clean-up crew
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