Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: you.
Hey girl, you must be a math book because you’re full of problems.
I really like you. So does my wife.
Hey girl, are you a newspaper?
Because you get picked up by random guys on the bus.
You look like my future ex wife.
Are you a parking ticket? Because you're evidence that I made a mistake.
The Best Break Up Lines
Want to know a joke? Our relationship.
You looked better when I was drunk.
I'm not gay but I'll learn.
Are you a New Years resolution? Because we stopped working out after the first two weeks
We must be a cast on a spiral fracture, girl. Because we’re on a serious break.
Hey, are you an anchor? Because you've done nothing but weigh me down.
You remind me of Halley's Comet. I don't wanna see you again for another 74 years.
It's time to be like a kit-kat and split up.
Girl you're looking like a snack and I'm going on a diet.
Dang girl, are you an angel? Because you are dead to me.
You are so right. And I am so left.
Hey, baby. I'm calling myself Han because you need to be Solo.
The mothership has returned and I must leave.
Are you a stop watch? Because our time is up.
What’s the difference between me and your socks? I’m not yours anymore.
I don’t know what I’d do without you, but starting tomorrow I’m going to give it a try.
What do deer doctors specialise in? Hart surgery!
Hey babe, I think its about time we cancel our gym membership. We're not working out anymore
Do you believe in love at first sight? How about misery after three years?
Damn girl, are you a magician’s assistant? Because I want you to disappear from my life.
We should make like your parents and split.
How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to break the thin ice our relationship is on.
It’s not you – it’s me. I don’t like you anymore.
Are you dessert because I'm finished.
Wanna see a magic trick? Abrakadabra, you're single now.
It's not you...it's your taste in music.
Hey, did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because honestly, Karen, you are a demon.
Are you an astronaut? Because I need some space.
"It's not me, it's you!"
Hear that sound? (cup hand to ear) Yep- that's a dump truck, and it's coming for you!
What does a deer hang on its Christmas tree?
“Horn – aments.”
I’d better get a library card, because I’m checking out of this relationship.
Hey baby, I think I'm going blind. Because I can't see you anymore.
I think we need to become better strangers.
Hey baby are you American cheese because you come as a single now.
Remember when I asked you out? Well, I was talking to the girl behind you.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
My divorce attorney
Excuse me, I seem to have lost my phone number, can you do the same?
Let’s make like a banana and split.
Hey baby, you know what sounds good? You and me never speaking to each other again.
We should make like the Soviet Union and split up.
Knock knock. Who's there? You're - You're who? - You're single!
Sorry sweety, but I think I'm in love with your mom.
I expected some baggage with our relationship but I didn’t expect the cargo of the Titanic to come floating to the surface.
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