"Roses are red, Violets are blue. Garbage is dumped, now so are you."
Hey, did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because honestly, Karen, you are a demon.
I think it would be hot if we f**ked other people. Exclusively.
Hey, baby. I'm calling myself Han because you need to be Solo.
Are you the dog? Because your shit’s all over the lawn.
"Our relationship is like a fat guy."
"What?"
"It's not working out."
Are you an astronaut? Because I need some space.
Raise your hand if you have a boyfriend.
Not so fast
You looked better when I was drunk.
Excuse me, I seem to have lost my phone number, can you do the same?
Girl: Your ex is so attractive
Boy: Which one?
Girl: ME. Goodbye.
Hey babe, how about I plan a romantic weekend get away, and while I’m gone you can pack your shit and GTFO?
Girl you're looking like a snack and I'm going on a diet.
Hear that sound? (cup hand to ear) Yep- that's a dump truck, and it's coming for you!
What does a deer hang on its Christmas tree?
“Horn – aments.”
"This isn't easy and neither are you. I'm breaking up with you."
Remember when I asked you out? Well, I was talking to the girl behind you.
Girl: Want to see a magic trick?
Boyfriend: Sure.
Girl: Poof you're single.
"I now pronounce you dumped and single. You may now kiss my ass."
Roses are red, violets are blue, I'd rather be dead than continue seeing you!
The mothership has returned and I must leave.
"Roses are red, violets are blue. We're breaking up beacause I never loved you."
"Is it hot in here or is this relationship suffocating me?"
What’s the difference between me and your socks? I’m not yours anymore.
We must be a cast on a spiral fracture, girl. Because we’re on a serious break.
Hey, remember back when we were a thing… Yeah… Good times.
Is it hot in here or is this relationship suffocating me?
I'm not gay but I'll learn.
Let’s make like an atom, and split.
"The longer we are together, the less serious I am about you."
I see my future like how the Americans spell colour. Without u.
Sorry sweety, but I think I'm in love with your mom.
Our relationship is like my financial status: Broke.
Baby are you an angel? Because I'm a atheist.
Dinosaurs represent our relationship, because they both don’t exist anymore.”
I will always cherish my initial misconceptions of you.
"I just can't live with the pathetic tickles that you call thrusts anymore."
You are so right. And I am so left.
I expected some baggage with our relationship but I didn’t expect the cargo of the Titanic to come floating to the surface.
Hey, babe. I think it's time we take our relationship to the previous level.
Wanna see a magic trick? Abrakadabra, you're single now.
"Hey baby, are you being followed? Because I've been seeing people behind your back."
"It's not me, it's you!"
"If it's meant to be it's meant to be....but just to be clear it isn't."
Girl, If you were a fruit you'd be a can't-elope.
Are you dessert because I'm finished.
Hey babe do you need crutches? Cause I can’t stand you anymore.
Do those legs go all the way? Because you should use them to go away.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
You made my life a mess
Please call a clean-up crew
Can we still share a netflix account?