Hey babe, I think its about time we cancel our gym membership. We're not working out anymore
Are you a fidget spinner? Because the last time I had fun with you was forever ago and I’m not really interested in touching you anymore. I’m pretty sure you were just a phase and now I’d really like to get you out of my house and forget it ever happened.
Do you happen to know sign language? Because this is the last time you’ll hear from me.
We need to cover more ground so we should split up.
Hey baby, you know what sounds good? You and me never speaking to each other again.
Hey, babe. I think it's time we take our relationship to the previous level.
"You deserve better and so do I."
Hey girl, you must be a math book because you’re full of problems.
Hey, remember back when we were a thing… Yeah… Good times.
This relationship is kinda like the Superbowl LIII halftime show; I can’t wait for it to be over.
Hey babe do you need crutches? Cause I can’t stand you anymore.
"It's not you...it's your taste in music"
It’s a good thing we’re bad at puzzles because there is no way we’re putting this shit back together.
I don’t know what I’d do without you, but starting tomorrow I’m going to give it a try.
How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to break the thin ice our relationship is on.
Let’s make like a banana and split.
Hey baby, remember how you said that you can’t live without me? Well, it’s time to get your affairs in order….
Are you an astronaut? Because I need some space.
"Look, our relationship is like doing push ups on your knees. It's just not working out"
We must be a cast on a spiral fracture, girl. Because we’re on a serious break.
Excuse me, I seem to have lost my phone number, can you do the same?
Girl, have we both been rendered sightless? Because we ain’t seeing each other anymore.
I'm not gay but I'll learn.
Hey, are you an anchor? Because you've done nothing but weigh me down.
"Sorry I stopped contacting you. I had to go back to rehab."
Girl: Your ex is so attractive
Boy: Which one?
Girl: ME. Goodbye.
Hey baby are you American cheese because you come as a single now.
"It's not me, it's you!"
I really like you. So does my wife.
"We are like a broken mirror. It is better to leave it broken than hurt yourself to fix it."
"My cat doesn't like you."
Girl, If you were a fruit you'd be a can't-elope.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I'd rather be dead than continue seeing you!
Dang girl, are you an angel? Because you are dead to me.
I think we need to become better strangers.
Do those legs go all the way? Because you should use them to go away.
Hey, baby. I'm calling myself Han because you need to be Solo.
The mothership has returned and I must leave.
Hey baby, I think I'm going blind. Because I can't see you anymore.
Remember when I asked you out? Well, I was talking to the girl behind you.
What do deer doctors specialise in? Hart surgery!
Hey babe, are you the Mcdonald's Ice Cream Machine, because you just aren't working for me anymore.
I just can't take the bad s*x anymore.
"Our relationship is like a fat guy."
"What?"
"It's not working out."
"I treated this relationship like my diet, one cheat day a week."
Girl: Want to see a magic trick?
Boyfriend: Sure.
Girl: Poof you're single.
What’s the difference between me and your socks? I’m not yours anymore.
Raise your hand if you have a boyfriend.
Not so fast
You look like my future ex wife.
Are you a thief? Because you stole a year of my life.