Aside from being single, what do you do for a living?
Can we still share a netflix account?
The Best Break Up Lines
Want to know a joke? Our relationship.
You’re the girl that everybody wants. Today is their lucky day.
"Really, our time together has just become more effort than you're worth."
Remember when I asked you out? Well, I was talking to the girl behind you.
What’s your sign? Mine is stop.
"Remember when I asked you out? Well, I was talking to the girl behind you"
"Look, our relationship is like doing push ups on your knees. It's just not working out"
Hey, babe. I think it's time we take our relationship to the previous level.
It's time to be like a kit-kat and split up.
I’d better get a library card, because I’m checking out of this relationship.
Dang girl, are you an angel? Because you are dead to me.
Hey baby, are you in a tunnel? Because we’re breaking up.
"If it's meant to be it's meant to be....but just to be clear it isn't."
Hear that sound? (cup hand to ear) Yep- that's a dump truck, and it's coming for you!
I think it would be hot if we f**ked other people. Exclusively.
The mothership has returned and I must leave.
"Our relationship is like a fat guy."
"What?"
"It's not working out."
"We are like a broken mirror. It is better to leave it broken than hurt yourself to fix it."
Here, look at this blank piece of paper for a second… I wrote every reason why we should stick together on it.
If I could rearrange the alphabet, I’d put I at the beginning and U at the end.
Are you a parking ticket? Because you're evidence that I made a mistake.
"It's not you...it's your taste in music"
Are you a thief? Because you stole a year of my life.
Hey, let's hold a costume party. You can be a bank, and I can be alone!
It’s not you – it’s me. I don’t like you anymore.
Do those legs go all the way? Because you should use them to go away.
Our relationship is like my financial status: Broke.
"I now pronounce you dumped and single. You may now kiss my ass."
Excuse me, I seem to have lost my phone number, can you do the same?
Do you happen to know sign language? Because this is the last time you’ll hear from me.
"You deserve better and so do I."
Knock knock. Who's there? You're - You're who? - You're single!
Hey baby, you know what sounds good? You and me never speaking to each other again.
Boy: Want to hear a joke?
Girlfriend: Sure.
Boy: Our relationship.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
But I don't care
Cause I'm leaving you.
Raise your hand if you have a boyfriend.
Not so fast
Hey girl, are you a newspaper?
Because you get picked up by random guys on the bus.
Girl you're looking like a snack and I'm going on a diet.
Are you a fire alarm? because you are really freaking loud and annoying
I really like you. So does my wife.
"Roses are red, violets are blue. We're breaking up beacause I never loved you."
I'm not gay but I'll learn.
Sorry sweety, but I think I'm in love with your mom.
"I'll always remember last night, but I think we can forget about tomorrow."
Roses are red, violets are blue, I'd rather be dead than continue seeing you!
Dinosaurs represent our relationship, because they both don’t exist anymore.”
Did we fall from the sky? Because we look pretty broken up right now.
Hey Pumpkin, I just wanted to say that I'm done with having Halloween every day.
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