I just bought my friend a mini fridge for his birthday
I can’t wait to see his face light up when he opens it.
I keep telling my wife I want a Segway for my birthday.
But every time I bring it up, she changes the topic.
What happens when no one comes to your birthday party?
You can have your cake and eat it too.
What is every horses birthday wish?
A stable economy.
My daughter want's the new iPhone for her birthday. I told her she will get one as long as she has good grades, does her chores, and follows the house rules. Otherwise she will get a cheaper phone, because.
It's my way or the Huawei.
Remember the one about people queuing up for drinks at Old Faithful's birthday party?
You're not missing much; the punch line blows.
For my girlfriend's birthday I got her a dwarfish clown who told jokes...
It wasn't a great gift, but she appreciated the jester.
It was my wife's birthday the other day
I took her to an orchard and we stood there for 20 minutes.
Apparently it wasn't the Apple watch she wanted.
What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday?
AYE, MATEY!
What did the boy without hands get for his birthday?
Nobody knows, he hasn't got the package open yet.
As I handed my dad his 50th birthday card, he looked at me with tears in his eyes and said ....
You know, one would have been enough.