March 17 is near, and I am so excited about it. The clover it gets, the more excited I become.
Why do people wear shamrocks on St. Patrick's Day?
Real rocks are too heavy.
Remember, Irish puns on St. Patrick's Day don't just shame you. They Seamus all.
A trip to Ireland is quite a cliffhanger.
What is it called when two Irish couples go out on a date?
Dublin.
Why did St. Patrick drive the snakes out of Ireland?
It was too expensive to fly and too long to walk.
This weekend, I will watch a new Irish movie based on a marathon runner who only ate potatoes. It is called Starch Trek.
What's Irish and stays out all night?
Paddy O'Furniture.
What do you call a big Irish spider?
A Paddy long legs.
What are the best sandwiches to serve at a St. Patrick’s Day party?
Paddy melts!
Why shouldn’t you iron a four-leaved clover?
You don’t want to press your luck.
I love when you coddle me.
In Ireland, when the cows are in the road it’s udder chaos.
Irish I had better jokes.
When does a leprechaun cross the road?
Just like everyone - when it's green!
How was the lepre-con caught?
By an under-clover police officer!
St. Patrick’s is all about the pursuit of hoppiness!
Why are the Irish so concerned about global warming?
They’re really into green living.
In Ireland, I call the shots.
What do you call it when leprechauns get together after being apart?
A wee-union!
Do you be-leaf in magic?
What do you call a fake Irish stone?
A shamrock.
The food here is quite so-fish-ticated.
Why can’t you borrow money from a leprechaun?
They’re always a little short.
Visitors are Doolin over these gorgeous views.
I’m a clover, not a fighter.
You’re my lucky charm.
Are people jealous of the Irish?
Yeah, they’re green with envy.
I’m ready to shamrock and roll.
Ireland always leaves me wanting Moher.
I saw some leprechauns putting coins in the vending machine but in vain. They were using lepre-coins.
Irish cuisine is stew-pendous.
You’re the cutest clover in the patch.
Why did Saint Patrick drive the snakes out of Ireland?
They were causing mass hiss-teria!
Why don’t leprechauns run?
They’d rather jig than jog.
Irish potatoes are spud-tacular.
What kind of spells do leprechauns use?
Lucky Charms!
I’m feelin’ green.