Roses are red, violets are black, why is your chest as flat as my back?
You're the thought that counts!
Honestly, I'm into necrophilia. Wanna come home and play dead?
Is your mom a hooker? Cause I'm hooked on you.
You're kind of ugly and fat. Lucky for you, I'm into those things.
Are you crippling depression and anxiety? Because you haunt me at every waking hour.
Are you Ebala? Because you melt my insides.
I like my partners, like how i like my fast-food meals. Extra-large!
I'd drink your bathwater.
You look like trash, may I take you out?
I dreamt about you. You died.
I used to go out with a homeless girl, like you. It was great. I could drop her off anywhere.
Hold still, there's a mosquito on your a$$.
Do you wanna come dance with the big bad wolf? [ No! ] Its okay, the other two pigs said no too!
Do you have to leave so soon? I was just going to poison your drink.
If you were even half as gorgeous as me, I'd consider sleeping with you.
Did you fall from heaven? Because so did Satan.
I would ask you if you're tired from running through my mind all day, but from the looks of it, you don't do any running.
Is that a discharge in your underwear, or are you just happy to see me?
My love for you is like cancer, it just keeps growing and growing.
Are your parents retarded, 'cause you sure are special.
Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!
How much does a polar bear weigh? Less than you, I would guess.
What's a slut like you doing in a classy joint like this?
Roses are red, violets are blue, Antarctica is hot compared to you.
You know the more I drink, the prettier you get!
You're that ugly that if I could do myself, I wouldn't need you.
You look a lot like my next victim.
My mom told me it would be good for my self-esteem if I asked out people who aren't conventionally attractive.
I accidentally pooped in my pants. Can I get into yours?
Since all the hot ones are already taken, this is going to be your lucky night!
I just pooped in my bed. Can I sleep in yours?
You smell... We should go take a shower together.
Your eyes are as blue as toilet water.
I was just curious? Are you as good as all the guys say you are?
You owe me a drink, you're so ugly I dropped mine when I saw you.
Are you a booger? Because I want to pick you first.
Hey baby, you got any diseases? Want some?
Pies aren't the new cupcakes, baby. You are.
Are you ice cream? Because your face looks like rocky road.
My love for you is like diarrhea. I just can't hold it in.
The fact that I'm missing some teeth only means that there's more room for your tongue.
Are you a human? Just making sure.
Do you want to be disappointed tonight?
I love you so much that If you were suddenly on fire, I'd pee on you.
How are you still so fat when you've been running in my mind for so long?
Just like I never play with poop, I promise you that I will never play with your heart.
The last time I saw a body like yours, I was burying it in my basement.
Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because you obviously landed on your face.
Are you the future? Because you're looking hopeless and bleak.
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