I bet your muffled screams are as cute as u.
I just pooped in my bed. Can I sleep in yours?
On a scale of 1 to 10, how much do I smell like your mom/dad?
You're that ugly that if I could do myself, I wouldn't need you.
I was just curious? Are you as good as all the guys say you are?
I love you so much I would eat the corn from your poop.
Are you an alarm clock? Because I want to kill you.
Hold still, there's a mosquito on your a$$.
Are your parents retarded, 'cause you sure are special.
Are you Ebala? Because you melt my insides.
I hear you're looking for a stud. Well, I've got the STD and all I need is you.
Do you want to be disappointed tonight?
Roses are red, violets are black, why is your chest as flat as my back?
I dreamt about you. You died.
How hot does your gas oven get?
My love for you is like cancer, it just keeps growing and growing.
What's a slut like you doing in a classy joint like this?
Is your mom a hooker? Cause I'm hooked on you.
Roses are red, violets are blue, Antarctica is hot compared to you.
You're like the neighbors' WiFi. Everyone wants to use you.
Are you crippling depression and anxiety? Because you haunt me at every waking hour.
You smell. We should go take a shower together.
You looking at me is making me turn as red as that roasted beet salad.
You look like trash, may I take you out?
My mom told me it would be good for my self-esteem if I asked out people who aren't conventionally attractive.
Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!
I accidentally pooped in my pants. Can I get into yours?
If you were even half as gorgeous as me, I'd consider sleeping with you.
Honestly, I'm into necrophilia. Wanna come home and play dead?
How much does a polar bear weigh? Less than you, I would guess.
You owe me a drink, you're so ugly I dropped mine when I saw you.
Wow, you have a the chin of Superman. I bet you could take a serious punch.
Your eyes are as blue as toilet water.
Are you a human? Just making sure.
You smell... We should go take a shower together.
Are you a booger? Because I want to pick you first.
I'd drink your bathwater.
Did you fall from heaven? Because so did Satan.
My feelings of love for you are like the stars in the sky. They're probably long dead.
Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because you obviously landed on your face.
Hold still, there's a mosquito on your a$$.
How are you still so fat when you've been running in my mind for so long?
If I could rewrite the alphabet, I would P on U.
You're so fine that I wouldn't care if you were dead or alive!
How much will $20 get me?
Are you ice cream? Because your face looks like rocky road.
Do you have to leave so soon? I was just going to poison your drink.
The fact that I'm missing some teeth only means that there's more room for your tongue.
Are you the future? Because you're looking hopeless and bleak.
You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.