Do you have to leave so soon? I was just going to poison your drink.
You look like trash, may I take you out?
How hot does your gas oven get?
My love for you is like diarrhea. I just can't hold it in.
I like my partners, like how i like my fast-food meals. Extra-large!
You look a lot like my next victim.
Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!
What's a slut like you doing in a classy joint like this?
Did you fall from heaven? Because so did Satan.
Are you Ebala? Because you melt my insides.
I just pooped in my bed. Can I sleep in yours?
My feelings of love for you are like the stars in the sky. They're probably long dead.
You're so fine that I wouldn't care if you were dead or alive!
I bet your muffled screams are as cute as u.
The last time I saw a body like yours, I was burying it in my basement.
Wow, you have a the chin of Superman. I bet you could take a serious punch.
I hear you're looking for a stud. Well, I've got the STD and all I need is you.
Damn! You're almost as hot as my sister/brother.
Pies aren't the new cupcakes, baby. You are.
Your eyes are as blue as toilet water.
Honestly, I'm into necrophilia. Wanna come home and play dead?
You're like the neighbors' WiFi. Everyone wants to use you.
You smell... We should go take a shower together.
Is that a discharge in your underwear, or are you just happy to see me?
For a fatty, you don't seem to sweat much.
Hold still, there's a mosquito on your a$$.
Are you an alarm clock? Because I want to kill you.
My mom told me it would be good for my self-esteem if I asked out people who aren't conventionally attractive.
Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because you obviously landed on your face.
Just like I never play with poop, I promise you that I will never play with your heart.
You're the thought that counts!
You smell just like my mom, want to grab a drink?
I'm willing to lower my standards if you're going on a date with me.
I love you so much I would eat the corn from your poop.
You're kind of ugly and fat. Lucky for you, I'm into those things.
I would ask you if you're tired from running through my mind all day, but from the looks of it, you don't do any running.
Are your parents retarded, 'cause you sure are special.
Are you a human? Just making sure.
You owe me a drink, you're so ugly I dropped mine when I saw you.
I love you so much that If you were suddenly on fire, I'd pee on you.
Hey baby, you got any diseases? Want some?
Do you want to be disappointed tonight?
I accidentally pooped in my pants. Can I get into yours?
You looking at me is making me turn as red as that roasted beet salad.
Since all the hot ones are already taken, this is going to be your lucky night!
Hold still, there's a mosquito on your a$$.
Are you the future? Because you're looking hopeless and bleak.
How are you still so fat when you've been running in my mind for so long?
If I could rewrite the alphabet, I would P on U.
You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.