My love for you is like cancer, it just keeps growing and growing.
You're so fine that I wouldn't care if you were dead or alive!
My mom told me it would be good for my self-esteem if I asked out people who aren't conventionally attractive.
I dreamt about you. You died.
Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because you obviously landed on your face.
You're that ugly that if I could do myself, I wouldn't need you.
Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!
Roses are red, violets are black, why is your chest as flat as my back?
Wow, you have a the chin of Superman. I bet you could take a serious punch.
How much will $20 get me?
My feelings of love for you are like the stars in the sky. They're probably long dead.
I just pooped in my bed. Can I sleep in yours?
I was just curious? Are you as good as all the guys say you are?
On a scale of 1 to 10, how much do I smell like your mom/dad?
Are your parents retarded, 'cause you sure are special.
I like my partners, like how i like my fast-food meals. Extra-large!
I love you so much that If you were suddenly on fire, I'd pee on you.
Do you have to leave so soon? I was just going to poison your drink.
How are you still so fat when you've been running in my mind for so long?
I accidentally pooped in my pants. Can I get into yours?
Damn! You're almost as hot as my sister/brother.
I love you so much I would eat the corn from your poop.
You smell. We should go take a shower together.
What's a slut like you doing in a classy joint like this?
My love for you is like diarrhea. I just can't hold it in.
Are you the future? Because you're looking hopeless and bleak.
Are you a human? Just making sure.
You smell just like my mom, want to grab a drink?
I would ask you if you're tired from running through my mind all day, but from the looks of it, you don't do any running.
The fact that I'm missing some teeth only means that there's more room for your tongue.
Roses are red, violets are blue, Antarctica is hot compared to you.
How hot does your gas oven get?
You know the more I drink, the prettier you get!
Are you a booger? Because I want to pick you first.
You're like the neighbors' WiFi. Everyone wants to use you.
You owe me a drink, you're so ugly I dropped mine when I saw you.
If you were even half as gorgeous as me, I'd consider sleeping with you.
I'm willing to lower my standards if you're going on a date with me.
You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
You're kind of ugly and fat. Lucky for you, I'm into those things.
I hear you're looking for a stud. Well, I've got the STD and all I need is you.
Just like I never play with poop, I promise you that I will never play with your heart.
Hold still, there's a mosquito on your a$$.
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