The last time I saw a body like yours, I was burying it in my basement.
Are you an alarm clock? Because I want to kill you.
You look like trash, may I take you out?
Are you a booger? Because I want to pick you first.
I like my partners, like how i like my fast-food meals. Extra-large!
I hear you're looking for a stud. Well, I've got the STD and all I need is you.
Hold still, there's a mosquito on your a$$.
I love you so much that If you were suddenly on fire, I'd pee on you.
I'm willing to lower my standards if you're going on a date with me.
Excuse me, I just farted over there. Can I stand here with you?
Are you a durian? Because you're a total snack, but you smell like rotting flesh.
You're so fine that I wouldn't care if you were dead or alive!
You're the thought that counts!
Damn! You're almost as hot as my sister/brother.
Roses are red, violets are blue, Antarctica is hot compared to you.
My love for you is like cancer, it just keeps growing and growing.
I accidentally pooped in my pants. Can I get into yours?
Do you want to be disappointed tonight?
My love for you is like diarrhea. I just can't hold it in.
Just like I never play with poop, I promise you that I will never play with your heart.
The fact that I'm missing some teeth only means that there's more room for your tongue.
You smell... We should go take a shower together.
You're kind of ugly and fat. Lucky for you, I'm into those things.
My mom told me it would be good for my self-esteem if I asked out people who aren't conventionally attractive.
You owe me a drink, you're so ugly I dropped mine when I saw you.
Are your parents retarded, 'cause you sure are special.
You smell. We should go take a shower together.
Are you Ebala? Because you melt my insides.
I dreamt about you. You died.
How much does a polar bear weigh? Less than you, I would guess.
Are you a human? Just making sure.
Are you crippling depression and anxiety? Because you haunt me at every waking hour.
You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
Is that a discharge in your underwear, or are you just happy to see me?
Do you wanna come dance with the big bad wolf? [ No! ] Its okay, the other two pigs said no too!
Are you ice cream? Because your face looks like rocky road.
Did you fall from heaven? Because so did Satan.
I'd drink your bathwater.
For a fatty, you don't seem to sweat much.
I used to go out with a homeless girl, like you. It was great. I could drop her off anywhere.
Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because you obviously landed on your face.
I bet your muffled screams are as cute as u.
Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!
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