I dreamt about you. You died.
Just like I never play with poop, I promise you that I will never play with your heart.
My love for you is like cancer, it just keeps growing and growing.
Are your parents retarded, 'cause you sure are special.
You're the thought that counts!
I accidentally pooped in my pants. Can I get into yours?
The last time I saw a body like yours, I was burying it in my basement.
Is your mom a hooker? Cause I'm hooked on you.
Is that a discharge in your underwear, or are you just happy to see me?
I love you so much I would eat the corn from your poop.
Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because you obviously landed on your face.
If I could rewrite the alphabet, I would P on U.
Hold still, there's a mosquito on your a$$.
I would ask you if you're tired from running through my mind all day, but from the looks of it, you don't do any running.
Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van!
You know the more I drink, the prettier you get!
How hot does your gas oven get?
If you were even half as gorgeous as me, I'd consider sleeping with you.
You're that ugly that if I could do myself, I wouldn't need you.
Wow, you have a the chin of Superman. I bet you could take a serious punch.
How much will $20 get me?
Roses are red, violets are blue, Antarctica is hot compared to you.
Hey baby, you got any diseases? Want some?
Do you have to leave so soon? I was just going to poison your drink.
Are you a durian? Because you're a total snack, but you smell like rotting flesh.
Are you ice cream? Because your face looks like rocky road.
My feelings of love for you are like the stars in the sky. They're probably long dead.
I hear you're looking for a stud. Well, I've got the STD and all I need is you.
For a fatty, you don't seem to sweat much.
Are you crippling depression and anxiety? Because you haunt me at every waking hour.
Damn! You're almost as hot as my sister/brother.
Are you a booger? Because I want to pick you first.
My love for you is like diarrhea. I just can't hold it in.
You look a lot like my next victim.
You're so fine that I wouldn't care if you were dead or alive!
Are you a human? Just making sure.
I'm willing to lower my standards if you're going on a date with me.
You're kind of ugly and fat. Lucky for you, I'm into those things.
I'd drink your bathwater.
Excuse me, I just farted over there. Can I stand here with you?
I used to go out with a homeless girl, like you. It was great. I could drop her off anywhere.
Are you Ebala? Because you melt my insides.
How much does a polar bear weigh? Less than you, I would guess.
Are you the future? Because you're looking hopeless and bleak.
Roses are red, violets are black, why is your chest as flat as my back?
Are you an alarm clock? Because I want to kill you.
You owe me a drink, you're so ugly I dropped mine when I saw you.
How are you still so fat when you've been running in my mind for so long?
You smell... We should go take a shower together.
Do you want to be disappointed tonight?
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