I send the best morning texts. But you’d know that already if I had your number.
Honey, if you were a space station, you’d be called Deep Space Fine.
Tonight I will be exercising my freedom of assembly… outside your bedroom window.
The thought of you makes me redder than the sands at North Shore.
How'd you like to go on a long romantic walk on the treadmill?
When you're around, every mall is a sky mall.
Do you know what rhymes with cucumber?
Can I get your phone number?
I hope I'm on your list of things to pick up today.
Oh I didn't mean to pull you in so close. I thought I heard a rutting bull moose.
Are you my Appendix? Because I have a funny feeling in my stomach that makes me feel like I should take you out.
Ever wonder what's happening under Orion's belt?
Are you a rusty bike? Because you gonna squeak and scream when I ride you tonight.
Sorry, but I can only be with you twice.
That's Now...and Forever.
Join me today, because I am in it for the long run when it comes to love.
I don’t know what I’d do without you, but starting tomorrow I’m going to give it a try.
I really can't finish a box of strawberries all by myself, Would you like to share with me over some wine?
We are perfect balance for each other.
I have no idea how you can look so great pre-coffee.
I’m not part of the Prohibition Movement. You can speakeasy to me.
If I told you that you have a wonderful antibody, would you hold it against me?
Won't you wear my ring up around your neck
To tell the world I'm yours by heck!
Unlike the Leafs, I will never let you down.
Do you live on Mars? ‘Cause you look out of this world.
Are you Australia? Cause your geographical location is hot.
Let’s spend some koala-ty time with each other.
You know what they say about a man with big feet... he wears big shoes.
If you were a fishing fly you'd be 'irresistible'.
Hi, my name's Microsoft. Can I crash at your place tonight?
Babe, your beauty throws me off-beat
Do you have a map? Because I just got lost in your eyes.
Do you want to be disappointed tonight?
Are you a singularity? Not only are you attractive, but the closer I get to you, the faster time seems to slip by.
I'm no organ donor, but I'd be happy to give you my heart.
How do you pronounce Jasmine? Because in my head it’s “Jas-MINE”.
Were you forged in the fires of Mount Doom? Because you're precious to me.
I want your flesh rocket in my hot pocket.
"We are like a broken mirror. It is better to leave it broken than hurt yourself to fix it."
I see my future like how the Americans spell colour. Without u.
Now I know why Solomon had 700 wives.
Because he never met you.
If I told you that you had a great body, would you hold it against me?
Hey girl. I won this gold medal, but I'd really like to win your heart.
You wanna know who makes my life complete? Read the first word in this sentence.
Hi, my name's Pogo. Wanna ride on my stick?
Hey Anna, how about you Anna I grab a drink sometime?
I’m considering a modulation… Because I want to come up to your level
Are you into hockey? That's great because I'd like to score.
I wanna Margaret your Thatcher.
Hello Boo-tiful.
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I’d rather be dead
Than stuck with you!
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Jamaican.
Jamaican who?
Jamaican me horny.
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