Love is a sensation, caused by a temptation, to feel penetration, a guy sticks his location in a girl’s destination, to increase the population for the next generation. Did you get my explanation, or do you need a demonstration?
Emphysema puffs pink, chronic bronchitis makes you blue, but no COPD makes me as breathless as you!
I should call you rainbow, because you’re passing with flying colors.
Roses are red
And you gotta go
Because I found out
That you is a ho.
Man: Hi! Didn't we go on a date once? Or was it twice?
Woman: Maybe once. I never make the same mistake twice!
I am not your first love, but I would love to be the last.
Do you want to be disappointed tonight?
I cannoli have eyes for you.
Until I saw you, I didn't believe I'd ever see an arctic fox.
I would love to live in Yorkshire, because it Leeds me to your heart.
Hey, are you Oscar? Because I really want to win you...
Do you like Dave Brubeck? ‘Cos I think we need to Take 5.
You must be regulated by the FDA because you treat, cure, and prevent my broken heart.
Do you wanna come dance with the big bad wolf? [ No! ] Its okay, the other two pigs said no too!
Wow, we really matched? I guess we’re simply Seb-posed to be
You look pretty cool, I hope you don’t lead me Jack to square one
Does your left eye hurt? Because you’ve been looking right all day.
I find my core strength in you.
Oof – is the Aaron here really fresh or is that just you?
You have the prettiest smile I have ever seen.
Are you a classic? Because my love for you is timeless.
Girl is your name baseball? Cause I just want to hit it with you.
It’s a good thing we’re bad at puzzles because there is no way we’re putting this shit back together.
Let me check your tag.
Yep, just as I thought - Made In Heaven.
I've got some wicked feelings brewing for you.
Are you a pile of soiled dishes? Because I want to spend the entire evening with you.
If I had a rose for every time I thought of you, I would be walking through my garden forever.
Date a hockey player, we always wear protection.
Wanna go out this weekend? Maybe go on a quick John-t around town?
Are you fossil? Because I want to date you!
Man: What do math and my dick have in common? They're both hard for you
Woman: You must be a math problem because you're annoying and difficult. I don't wanna solve your problems for you.
Repeat this as many times as you get rejected until you get the number. Works like a charm.
Affogato? Afforgeto where I am when I'm with you.
We have such great chemistry that we should do some biology together.
My heart is as desolate as Saskatchewan without you.
Can I take your picture? I want Santa to know exactly what I want for Christmas.
So, what do you turn into at midnight?
Are you sitting on a candle? Because your booty is on fire.
Shouldn’t we be carbon dating right now? Let’s get on with it.
I'm not gay but I'll learn.
Just promise you won’t tamper with my heart.
If I had Jack Sparrow's compass, it'd be pointing at you.
You shift my emotional oxy-hemoglobin saturation curve to the left! Easy to bind, hard to let go...
Hey cutie nice pants, got any room in there for me.
Copernicus was wrong, you are the center of my universe.
Oh, Darling, I'd like to be in your octopus garden
"It's not because I don't like you, it's because I hate you."
The square root of all my fantasies is you.
"Our relationship is like a fat guy."
"What?"
"It's not working out."
You are the reason Santa even has a naughty list.
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