I just can't take the bad s*x anymore.
We need to cover more ground so we should split up.
I see my future like how the Americans spell colour. Without u.
It’s a good thing we’re bad at puzzles because there is no way we’re putting this shit back together.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I'd rather be dead than continue seeing you!
Hey, babe. I think it's time we take our relationship to the previous level.
Roses are red, violets are blue, trash is dumped and so are you.
We're donion rings.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
But I don't care
Cause I'm leaving you.
It’s not you – it’s me. I don’t like you anymore.
Hey Pumpkin, I just wanted to say that I'm done with having Halloween every day.
Let’s make like an atom, and split.
Are you a dollar bill? Because you’re single.
Are you a fire alarm? because you are really freaking loud and annoying
Whoa, Heaven must be missing an angel! Because you’re dead to me.
They say one man's trash is another man's treasure. I hope you find someone who treasures you.
Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: you.
I'm not gay but I'll learn.
Hey baby, you know what sounds good? You and me never speaking to each other again.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
My divorce attorney
Wanna see a magic trick? Abrakadabra, you're single now.
Hey baby, remember how you said that you can’t live without me? Well, it’s time to get your affairs in order….
It's not you...it's your taste in music.
Did we fall from the sky? Because we look pretty broken up right now.
I don’t know what I’d do without you, but starting tomorrow I’m going to give it a try.
Hey, baby. I'm calling myself Han because you need to be Solo.
Damn girl, are you a magician’s assistant? Because I want you to disappear from my life.
Dinosaurs represent our relationship, because they both don’t exist anymore.”
Girl, have we both been rendered sightless? Because we ain’t seeing each other anymore.
Are you a thief? Because you stole a year of my life.
Hey baby are you American cheese because you come as a single now.
Raise your hand if you have a boyfriend.
Not so fast
Dang girl, are you an angel? Because you are dead to me.
Baby are you an angel? Because I'm a atheist.
Are you a New Years resolution? Because we stopped working out after the first two weeks
Hey girl, you must be a math book because you’re full of problems.
Sorry sweety, but I think I'm in love with your mom.
There's something I've been wanting to say since the day we met. Goodbye.
What do deer doctors specialise in? Hart surgery!
Are you dessert because I'm finished.
I expected some baggage with our relationship but I didn’t expect the cargo of the Titanic to come floating to the surface.
I really like you. So does my wife.
I think we need to become better strangers.
Hey babe, are you the Mcdonald's Ice Cream Machine, because you just aren't working for me anymore.
Will you be the sun in my life? Then stay millions of miles away from me.
I think this has been said somewhere else.
What does a deer hang on its Christmas tree?
“Horn – aments.”
We must be a cast on a spiral fracture, girl. Because we’re on a serious break.
Hey baby, I think I'm going blind. Because I can't see you anymore.
Honey, I need you to cancel my subscription. I’m done with your issues.
It's time to be like a kit-kat and split up.