"I refuse to admit I’m more than fifty-two, even if that does make my sons illegitimate." - Nancy Astor
"Everything slows down with age, except the time it takes cake and ice cream to reach your hips." - John Wagner
"Nice to be here? At my age it’s nice to be anywhere." – George Burns
"Nobody expects to trust his body much after the age of fifty." - Alexander Hamilton
"The years between 50 and 70 are the hardest. You are always being asked to do things, and yet you are not decrepit enough to turn them down." - T.S. Elliot
"I don't do alcohol anymore—I get the same effect just standing up fast." - Anonymous
"At fifty, everyone has the face he deserves." - George Orwell
"Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once." - Dave Barry
"There’s a reason why forty, fifty, and sixty don’t look the way they used to and it’s not because of feminism, or better living through exercise. It’s because of hair dye." Nora Ephron
"Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened." - Jennifer Yane
"At my age ‘getting lucky’ means walking into a room and remembering what I came in for." - Unknown
"Don't let aging get you down. It's too hard to get back up." - John Wagner
"Men do not quit playing because they grow old—they grow old because they quit playing." - Oliver Wendell Holmes
"I can honestly say I love getting older. Then again, I never put my glasses on before looking in the mirror." - Cherie Lunghi
"Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your retirement home."- Phyllis Diller
"If I’d known I was going to live this long, I’d have taken better care of myself." - Anonymous
"When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it’s a sure sign you’re getting old." - Mark Twain
"There’s one advantage to being 102, there’s no peer pressure." - Dennis Wolfberg
"Thirty-five is a very attractive age. London society is full of women of the very highest birth who have, of their own free choice, remained thirty-five for years." - Oscar Wilde
"Old age is like a plane flying through a storm. Once you are aboard there is nothing you can do about it." - Golda Meir
"Grandchildren don’t make a man feel old, it’s the knowledge that he’s married to a grandmother that does." - J. Norman Collie
"I've never known a person who lives to be 110 who is remarkable for anything else." —Josh Billings
"Old age comes at a bad time." – San Banducci
“The older I get, the better I used to be.” – Lee Trevino
"A stockbroker urged me to buy a stock that would triple its value every year. I told him, ‘At my age, I don’t even buy green bananas.’" - Claude Pepper
"I didn’t get old on purpose, it just happened. If you’re lucky, it could happen to you." – Andy Ronney
"I’m so old that my blood type is discontinued." - Bill Dane
"Life seems to fade our memory, so on this birthday I will forget yours if you forget mine!" - Kate Summers
"Getting older. I used to be able to run a 4-minute mile, bench press 380 pounds, and tell the truth." - Conan O’Brien
“Aging seems to be the only available way to live a long life.” - Kitty O’Neill Collins
"There is still no cure for the common birthday." - John Glenn
"Regrets are the natural property of grey hairs." - Charles Dickens
"The idea is to die young as late as possible." - Ashley Montagu
"Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional" - Chili Davis
"First you forget names, then you forget faces, then you forget to pull your zipper up, then you forget to pull your zipper down." - Leo Rosenberg
"You know you’re getting old when the candles cost more than the cake." – Bob Hope
"I have successfully completed the thirty-year transition from wanting to stay up late to just wanting to go to bed." - Unknown
"Age is something that doesn’t matter, unless you are a cheese." – Billie Burke
"I’m like old wine. They don’t bring me out very often… but I’m well preserved." - Rose Kennedy
"Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen." - Mark Twain