"The older I get, the more clearly I remember things that never happened. - Mark Twain
"Men do not quit playing because they grow old—they grow old because they quit playing." - Oliver Wendell Holmes
"All men are the same age." - Dorothy Parker
"Children are a great comfort in your old age, and they help you reach it faster, too." – Lionel Kauffman
"As we grow older, our bodies get shorter and our anecdotes longer." - Robert Quillen"
"You can live to be a hundred if you give up all things that make you want to live to be a hundred." - Woody Allen
"I’m at that age where my back goes out more than I do." - Phyllis Diller
"When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it’s a sure sign you’re getting old." - Mark Twain
"Looking fifty is great—if you’re sixty." - Joan Rivers
"Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act." - Truman Capote
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