“He who marries for love without money has good nights and sorry days.” – Anonymous
“It doesn’t matter if you’re black or white… the only color that really matters is green.” – Family Guy
“What’s your favorite childhood memory? Not paying bills.” – Anonymous
“The poor have more children, but the rich have more relatives.” – Unknown
“There’s a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It’s called marriage” — James Holt McGavran
“Misers are no fun to live with, but they make great ancestors.” —Tom Snyder
“I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy something.” -Jackie Mason“I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy something.” -Jackie Mason
"They were a people so primitive they did not know how to get money, except by working for it." ~ Joseph Addison
“October: This is one of the particularly dangerous months to invest in stocks. Other dangerous months are July, January, September, April, November, May, March, June, December, August and February.” Mark Twain
“It’s money. I remember it from when I was single” — Billy Crystal
“No matter how hard you hug your money, it never hugs back.” — H. Jackson Brown Jr.
“If you pay peanuts, you get monkeys” – James Goldsmith
“I’m tired of hearing about money, money, money, money, money. I just want to play the game, drink Pepsi, wear Reebok.” — Shaquille O’Neal
“Business is the art of extracting money from another man’s pocket without resorting to violence." ~Max Amsterdam
“They were a people so primitive they did not know how to get money, except by working for it.” Joseph Addison.
“The best way you hurt rich people is by turning them into poor people” – Billy Ray Valentine (Eddie Murphy) Trading Places
“If there is a WILL, there are 500 relatives.” – Anonymous
“If only God would give me a clear sign, like making a large deposit in my swiss bank account." ~ Woody Allen
“Money and women are the most sought after and the least known about of any two things we have.”— Will Rogers
“There were times my pants were so thin I could sit on a dime and tell if it was heads or tails.” -Spencer Tracy quotes
“Carpe per diem – seize the check.” – Robin Williams.
“A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it.” – Bob Hope
“Money’s only something you need in case you don’t die tomorrow.” – Carl Fox (Martin Sheen)Wall Street
"We live by the golden rule. Those who have the gold make the rules." ~ Unknown
“Money can’t buy happiness, but it can buy beer." ~ Gary Reilly
“Someone stole all my credit cards, but I won’t be reporting it. The thief spends less than my wife did.” -Henny Youngman
“A bargain is something you can’t use at a price you can’t resist.”- Franklin Jones.
"I despise the lottery. There’s less chance of you becoming a millionaire than there is of getting hit by a passing asteroid." ~ Unknown
“All I ask is a chance to prove that money can’t make me happy." ~ Spike Milligan
“If women didn’t exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning." ~Aristotle Onassis
“I love money. I love everything about it. I bought some pretty good stuff. Got me a $300 pair of socks. Got a fur sink. An electric dog polisher. A gasoline powered turtleneck sweater. And, of course, I bought some dumb stuff, too.” – Steve Martin
"It’s easy to meet expenses, everywhere we go, there they are." ~ Anonymus
“Money isn’t the most important thing in life, but it’s reasonably close to oxygen on the “gotta have it” scale." ~Zig Ziglar
“They say that love is more important, but have you ever tried to pay your bills with a hug?” – Anonymous
“I’m spending a year dead for tax reasons.” Douglas Adams.
"Car sickness is the feeling you get when the monthly payment is due." ~Author Unknown
“Money often costs too much." ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
“Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a refund from the IRS, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with." ~From a Washington Post word contest
“You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance.” —Franklin P. Adams
"Money doesn’t change you. It reveals who you are when you no longer have to be nice." ~ Tim Ferriss
“The safest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it in your pocket.” – Kin Hubbard
"Whoever said money can’t buy happiness didn’t know where to go shopping." ~ Bo Derek
“I rob banks because that’s where the money is.” Willie Sutton.
"Most people work just hard enough to not get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit." ~ George Carline
“Money can’t buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery." ~ Spike Milligan
“The economy depends about as much on economists as the weather does on weather forecasters." ~Jean-Paul Kauffmann
“Money isn’t everything but it sure keeps you in touch with your children." ~ J. Paul Getty
“It’s amazing how fast later comes when you buy now!” — Milton Berle
"Too many people spend money they haven’t earned, to buy things they don’t want, to impress people they don’t like." ~ Will Smith
“Money is like manure. You have to spread it around or it smells." ~J. Paul Getty
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