"Is it hot in here or is this relationship suffocating me?"
"The longer we are together, the less serious I am about you."
Are you a New Years resolution? Because we stopped working out after the first two weeks
Let’s make like a banana and split.
You look like my future ex wife.
It’s a good thing we’re bad at puzzles because there is no way we’re putting this shit back together.
What did the weather reporter say to his wife?
“I hope it doesn’t rain, deer!”
"You deserve better and so do I."
The mothership has returned and I must leave.
We're donion rings.
Here, look at this blank piece of paper for a second… I wrote every reason why we should stick together on it.
Hey, are you an anchor? Because you've done nothing but weigh me down.
Girl: Your ex is so attractive
Boy: Which one?
Girl: ME. Goodbye.
Hey girl, are you a newspaper?
Because you get picked up by random guys on the bus.
You are so right. And I am so left.
"This isn't easy and neither are you. I'm breaking up with you."
The Best Break Up Lines
Want to know a joke? Our relationship.
Are you a fire alarm? because you are really freaking loud and annoying
Are you the dog? Because your shit’s all over the lawn.
It's time to be like a kit-kat and split up.
Dang girl, are you an angel? Because you are dead to me.
Is it hot in here or is this relationship suffocating me?
Hey Pumpkin, I just wanted to say that I'm done with having Halloween every day.
Hey babe, how about I plan a romantic weekend get away, and while I’m gone you can pack your shit and GTFO?
Whoa, Heaven must be missing an angel! Because you’re dead to me.
Hey, baby. I'm calling myself Han because you need to be Solo.
Are you an astronaut? Because I need some space.
"Look, our relationship is like doing push ups on your knees. It's just not working out"
Hey girl, you must be a math book because you’re full of problems.
I’d better get a library card, because I’m checking out of this relationship.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I'd rather be dead than continue seeing you!
Girl, have we both been rendered sightless? Because we ain’t seeing each other anymore.
I will always cherish my initial misconceptions of you.
Hear that sound? (cup hand to ear) Yep- that's a dump truck, and it's coming for you!
I just can't take the bad s*x anymore.
"I now pronounce you dumped and single. You may now kiss my ass."
"Sorry I stopped contacting you. I had to go back to rehab."
Roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and so were you... but now the roses are wilted the violets are dead the sugar bowls empty and so is your head.
How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to break the thin ice our relationship is on.
You’re the girl that everybody wants. Today is their lucky day.
Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: you.
Aside from being single, what do you do for a living?
It's not you...it's your taste in music.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
But I don't care
Cause I'm leaving you.
Hey baby are you American cheese because you come as a single now.
Are you a thief? Because you stole a year of my life.
"You're not Mr. Right.... just Mr. Right Now."
You remind me of Halley's Comet. I don't wanna see you again for another 74 years.
"It's not because I don't like you, it's because I hate you."
Roses are red
Violets are blue
You made my life a mess
Please call a clean-up crew
Go to BabaMail
