Who’s the head of the penguin navy?
Admiral Byrd!
Who is a penguin’s favourite family member?
Aunt Artica.
Why was the penguin so annoying?
Because he was always fishing for complements.
What do you call a happy penguin?
a Pen-Grin!
What did the sea say to the penguin?
Nothing, it just waved.
What do you give a sick penguin?
Tweetment.
What does an evil penguin lay?
Deviled eggs.
What do you call a penguin in the desert?
Lost!
Where do penguins go swimming?
At the South Pool!
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice-bergers!
What do Penguins like to eat?
Brrrrrrrritos.
How does a penguin make pancakes?
With its flippers.
What did the penguin say after he went shopping?
Put it on my bill.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
To go with the floe!
Why are penguins good race drivers?
Because they’re always in the pole position.
What does a penguin where to the beach?
An ice cap.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers!
How do penguins make a decision?
Flipper coin.
What do you call fifty penguins at the North Pole?
Really lost. (Penguins live in the Southern Hemisphere)!
How do you get down off an penguin?
You don’t – you get down off a duck.
How did the penguin pass his driving test?
He winged it.
Where do penguins go to the movies?
At the dive-in!
Why did the penguin cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide.
Where does a penguin go when it loses its tail?
A re-tail store.
What do you call a penguin in a shell suit?
An egg.
Where does a penguin keep its money?
In a snow bank.
What’s a penguin’s favorite salad?
Iceberg lettuce!
What is a penguin racing driver’s favourite part of the car?
The Eggs-celerator.
What do Penguins sing on a birthday?
Freeze a jolly good fellow.
Who’s the head of the penguin navy?
Admiral Byrd.
What do penguins drink during the summer?
Iced tea.
Which side of a penguin has the most feathers?
The outside.
What’s black and white, black and white, and black and white?
A penguin rolling down a hill.
What do penguins wear on their heads?
Ice caps!
How does a penguin build it’s house?
Igloos it together.
What do you call a cold penguin?
A Brrr-d.
Who is a Penguin’s favorite pop star?
Seal.
Why was the penguin a good race car driver?
He always started in pole position.
Why was the penguin popular?
Because he was an ice guy.
What do you call a happy penguin?
A penGRIN.
Who’s the penguin’s favorite Aunt?
Aunt-Arctica.
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets!
Why don’t penguins fly?
They are not tall enough to be pilots.
Where does a 500-pound penguin sit?
Anywhere it wants.
How does a penguin get around?
By icicle.
What did one Emperor Penguin say to the other?
Nothing, he just gave him the cold shoulder.
What do penguins sing at a birthday party?
Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.
What birds like to write?
Penguins!
Why are penguins good race drivers?
Because they’re always in the pole position!