What did the horse reply when asked if it would try water polo?
“I would dapple.”
Why did the horse climb Everest?
She liked mount-ains.
Why does the horse go to school?
It brings her fulfillyment.
A pony goes to see the doctor one day.
He says, "Doc, you've got to help me. I've had this terrible sore throat for weeks and I think there must be some badly wrong."
The doctor examines him and then reassures him saying, "It's okay, it's nothing serious; you're just a little horse."
How do you wash a horse?
On a sponge-line.
What’s a horse’s favorite animated movie?
Bolt.
Why couldn’t the little girl ride the horse?
It was feeling bucky.
How does a horse drink wine?
With a de-canter.
Why was the horse feeling a bit sick?
Its voice was a bit hoarse.
What does a Clydesdale say when you offer them a carrot?
“Of course, my horse.”
What does the winged horse do after it goes to the bathroom?
Pegaflushes.
What did one horse say to the other after he said he wanted to drop out?
That’s an equestionable decision.
What do you call a pony running in a circle? Centrifugal horse.
What natural disaster took out the ancient horses?
A volcanic stirruption.
What’s a horse’s favorite dance move?
Watch me whip, now watch me neigh neigh.
Black Beauty - Now there's a dark horse.
Why did the pony turn himself in?
He felt rem-horse.
What’s a horse’s favorite country singer?
Colt-on Underwood.
What did the horse say when it saw a sheepdog?
“Why is your furlong?”
Why does a horse’s hair always look so good?
She mane-tains it.
What do horses use to eat?
Breastplates.
How did the horse get up the stairs?
He mounted them.
What did the Clydesdale use to deal cards at the casino?
A horse-shoe.
Where do horses get their mane cut?
The hair-dressager.
What does a horse call its treats?
My greatest preakness.
Where do the cool horses live?
In rad-docks.
What do you call a well-balanced horse?
Stable.
Why was the horse sad she didn’t get the job?
She was flanking on it.
How do winged horses walk if they become pirates?
Peg-asus legs.
What do you call a horse going down a waterslide?
Horseback sliding.
Why couldn’t the equestrian find the carrots? They were down by the bay.
Why is Pegasus so smart?
He’s all kno-wing.
How did the horse know the others were gossiping about him?
He herd.
How could you tell the horse was getting old?
It was wither-ing away.
How does a rude princess sit on a horse?
Snide-saddle.
Where do horses buy groceries?
Whinny-Dixie.
What do racehorses eat?
Fast food.
How did the pony get the bugs away?
It said, horse-shoo fly, don’t bother me.
How do baby horses get tucked in at night?
They get told a tail.
Where do horses go to the bathroom?
The bathroom stall-ion.
Why did the horse go to jail?
The prosecutors failed to show the burden of hoof.
When do vampires like horse racing?
When it's neck and neck.
What kind of horse would Bilbo Baggins ride?
A shire.
Why do horses make good lawyers?
Attention to de-tail.
What's a horse's favorite sport?
Stable tennis.
What’s a horse’s favorite grocery store?
No-fillies.
What’s a horse’s favorite sport?
Saddleball.
What’s does a winged horse like to munch on?
Pe-grass-us.
What’s happens to the sportiest horse?
It gets to be first horse-pick of the draft.
What do you say when your horse proposes to your other horse?
Call the marrier!
What does a workhorse like to drink?
A Moscow Mule.