Q. Which kind of ape enjoys smoking tobaco?
A. Cigarilla.
Q. Which country was founded by wild gorillas?
A. The Banana Republic.
Q. Why did the girl-illa win the beauty contest?
A. She was beast of show!
Q. What is a gorilla's favorite movie?
A. Planet of the Apes.
Q. What do you call a gorilla who studies large primates and has great grades?
A. Ape lust student.
Q. Where do gorillas get their gossip?
A. From the grapevine.
Q. Where did the gorilla like to go sailing?
A. The Chimpan-Sea
Q. What is a gorilla's favorite toy?
A. A bab-boom-orang.
Q. What do you call an entertaining gorilla eating a banana?
A. Ape peeling.
What did the gorilla say after spending one month at te gym?
Geez, gain a little muscle mass, and everybody acuses you of steroids. As if eating too many bananas wasn't dopey enough!
Old gorillas never die, but they do go bananas.
Q. Which book makes virgin gorillas blush?
A. The Naked Ape.
Q. Why was the baby gorilla such a big brat?
A. Because his parents are big apes.
Q. Why was the gorilla's jungle party so lame?
A. Because theyran out of chimps and dip.
Q. What kind of underwear do s*xy gorillas wear?
A. Chim-pant-zies.
Q. What haapens if a gorilla sits on your piano?
A. You get a flat note.
Q. What happens when a gorilla has a melt down?
A. He goes absolutely bananas!
Q. Why did the gorilla cross the road?
A. To get to the monkey biz on the other side.
Q. What do they call the gorilla marathon runner who only wins when it's pouring outdoors?
A. The raining chimp-ion.
Q. Whay aren't gorillas afraid of zombies?
A. Because the ape-ocalypse doesn't frighten them.
Q. Which US city holds the record for suicidal gorillas jumping off skyscrapers?
A. Fall-Adelphia.
Q. What is a gorilla in a wheelchair called?
A. Dis-ape-led.
Q. Where do lady gorillas go for a wild weekend night out?
A. Chimpendale's.
Q. What did the Aussie zookeeper say to the gorilla who was spying on him?
A. There's no need to pry, mate.
Q. What do you get if you cross a gorilla with a grizzly bear?
A. Fired from the zoo.
Q. Why are big gorilla turds always so stinking tired?
A. Because they're all pooped out!
Q. Why doesn't a big gorilla have to flush the toilet?
A. He scares the sh*t out of it!
Q. Why did the gorilla go to the barber?
A. He was concerned about his ape-pearance.
Q. How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A. Two, but it has to be a really BIG light bulb.
Q. Why was the blonde disappointed after her visit to an apiary?
A. There weren't any gorillas there. DUH!
Q. Why was the lady baboon so atrracted to the big gorilla?
A. 'Cause he had s*x ape-peal.
Q. What does the alpha gorilla call his first wife?
A. His prime mate.
Q. How do you make a sasquatch, a yeti, or a bigfoot laugh?
A. Tell it a gorilla joke!
Q. Why do educated gorillas like the numbers 1, 3, 5, 7, 11 and 13?
A. 'Cause they're prime apes.
Q. What do gorillas and big apes do to make each other laugh?
A. They tell punny jokes about humans!
Q. What do you call gorillaS who just monkey around at the gym?
A. Buff-oons
Q. What is a gorilla's favorite holiday?
A. Ape-ril Fools Day!
Q. Why couldn't the gorilla run in the marathon?
A. Because he's not part of the human race!
How did Gertie Gorilla win the beauty contest? She was the beast of the show!
How do you prepare a Gorilla sundae? Your start getting it ready Fridae and Saturdae!
Where do the monkeys melt their cheese?
Under the gorilla.
What did the Gorilla say to his friend when he called him back on the phone?
You-Rang-a-Tang?
If you were in the jungle, and a gorilla charged you, what should you do?
Pay him.
Which technique does a Gorilla borrow from another animal when it gets romantic? The bear hug!
How do gorillas get down the stairs? They slide down the banana-ster!
What’s a gorilla’s favourite pop group? A: Bananarama!
Why did the Buddhist gorilla get locked out of his monastery?
He forgot his monk-key
Have you heard about the gorilla who got a name change?
Peaches the gorilla escaped from the zoo, but when they got him back they had to change it because it turns out he had become an Ape Re-caught.
What do you call a gorilla in a cement-mixer?
King Koncrete.
What did the Gorilla say when he saw there was a sale happening?
Ooh! OOh! OOOh!!!!