How many limbs does an alligator have?
It all depends on what he ate for lunch, dinner and breakfast.
I went to the zoo the other day and saw an alligator that will only eat finely chopped food.
It was an alligrator.
What has 80 teeth and 2 eyes ?
A crocodile.
What do you call an alligator who’s your friend?
A pal-igator.
If you ever need directions, call for a navi-gator.
What do you call a crocodile that likes to bowl?
An alley-gator!
What is good at maths and related to a crocodile?
A calcu-gator
What’s worse than one crocodile coming to dinner?
Two crocodiles coming to dinner.
What do alligators call human children?
Appetizers.
What is a nerdy alligator’s favorite programming language?
Jaw-va.
What type of flooring do alligators have in their homes?
Rep-tiles.
Any time I wear a t shirt with a picture of a crocodile on it, I feel a little sick.
I think I might be Lacoste intolerant.
When a girl saw a sad alligator at the zoo she asked him; hey are you cai-man?
Why won’t crocodiles attack lawyers?
Professional courtesy!
What came first, the alligator or the crocodile?
The dinosaur.
If you need a mystery-solving, just call an in-vesti-gator.
Did you hear about the croc calling the frog? He just croc-o-dialled.
Why should you be careful not to insult a crocodile?
It may come back to bite you in the butt.
What do you call an alligator who is holding a compass?
A navigator.
What do you call a reptile that works on a farm?
An irri-gator.
What’s an alligator’s favorite dip?
Croc-amole.
What do you call an alligator who is wearing crocs on his feet?
A traitor.
Why don’t alligators watch movies?
Because they live in swamps.
My pet crocodile needs help
Can I give him gatorade or does it only work for alligators?
Have you seen the gators on skateboards, they are great alli-skaters.
What do you call an alligator that will only eat sacrificed lambs?
A hallaligator.
A crocodile tried to copy a rooster to wake his friends one morning, he went croc-a-doodle do.
What do dehydrated alligators drink?
Gatorade.
What do you call a crocodile that keeps breaking the law?
A crookadile.
I told the other alligator to stay outside, he cai-man anyway.
I’ll have a crocodile sandwich please, and make it snappy!
Did you hear about the law firm with the most intimidating lawyers?
It’s filled with liti-gators.
Some people like to play croc-quet.
What do you call an alligator that sneaks up and bites you from behind?
A tail-gater.
A guy wearing a suit and tie walks into a bar with an alligator…
He walks up to the bartender and asks, “Do you serve lawyers here?”
“Yes sir, we do,” says the bartender.
The guy smiles and says, “Great. Then I’ll have a beer, and my ‘gator will have a lawyer.”
My favorite music is by Spandau Croc-quet.
Why are alligators long and green?
Because if they were small and red, they would be tomatoes.
What do you call a SWAT team of alligators?
Gator-raid.
What do you call people who are obsessed with crocodiles?
Crocophiles.
Let's play some scrabble, I just need to get the croc-a-tiles.
Why don't alligators like fast food?
Because it is difficult to catch.
When alligators need energy, they just slug down some gator-ade.
What do crocodiles wear to keep their legs dry in the water?
Gaiters.
Did you know alligators can grow up to 18 feet?
But most of them only have four!
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
You are really talented. You should join a punk-croc band.
What do you get if you cross an alligator with a flower?
I don’t know, but I will not smell it!
What do you call an alligator that’s a very skilled conversationalist?
A dialogator.
What card game do crocodiles like playing?
Snap!
I like you, you croc my world.