What do you call an Arab next to a cow?
Milk Sheikh.
Where do cows get together?
The meet market.
What sound do you hear when you drop a bomb on a cow?
Cowboom.
What country do cows love to visit?
Moo Zealand.
What is the difference between a car and a bull?
A car only has one horn.
What do you call it when cows do battle in outer space?
Steer Wars.
How do you make a milkshake?
Give a cow a pogo stick.
What is a cow’s favorite lunch meat?
Bullogna.
When the cow forget how to give milk, she was udderly confused.
Where do cows go on vacation?
Moo York.
Why is it a bad idea to give a cow marijuana?
The steaks are too high.
Why did the farmer feed money to his cow?
He wanted rich milk.
Where did the bull carry his stock-market report?
In his beef case
Why doesn’t Sweden export its cattle?
It wants to keep its Stockholm.
How did the calf’s final exam turn out?
Grade A.
What does a cow put on his French toast?
Moooolasses.
You can always find the little cows eating lunch inside the calf-etiria.
Why wouldn’t anyone play with the little longhorn?
He was too much of a bully.
When doesn’t a bull have horns?
When it’s a bullfrog.
What has four legs and goes Oom, Oom?
A cow walking backwards.
What did the cow who barged the other cow say?
Moo-ve!
What newspaper do cows read?
The Daily Moos.
What South American dance do cows like to do?
The Rump-a.
What do you call an evil cow?
De-mooooon.
What do cows get when they are sick? Hay Fever.
The Secret Service surround the President with twelve cows because they were attempting to beef up their security.
What’s the best way to make a bull sweat?
Put him in a tight jumper.
What do cows do when they’re introduced?
They give each other a milk shake.
The manager for that dairy farm was referred to as the cow-ordinator.
What do cows do for entertainment?
They rent moovies!
Why do cows think cooks are mean?
They whip cream.
If you mix a ghost and a cow together, you will create vanishing cream.
What is the definition of “moon”?
The past tense of “moo”.
The reason you will see all the cows lie down when it starts to rain is because they want to keep each
udder dry.
Cows will never make the police force because they simply refuse to go on steak-outs.
Where do pigs learn about magic?
Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.
Where do Russians get their milk?
From Mos-cows.
What two members of the cow family go everywhere with you?
Your calves.
Why did the cow wear a bell around her neck?
Because her horn didn’t work.
The only difference between pea soup and roast beef is anyone can roast beef.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.