What is a bat’s favorite dessert?
Pineapple upside-down cake.
What do you call a bat with ebola? African batman.
What do you get when you cross a bat with the internet? blood-thirsty hacker baby
What do vampire bats call their friends?
Blood brothers.
Why could not the young vampire bat play baseball?
He was a bat boy.
How do bats spend their time?
Flying and hanging out.
Where do bats get their education?
In night schools.
What did hear about the two bats meeting?
It was love at first bite!
How do bats line up in school?
In alpha-bat-ical order.
What did the bat do when she did not know the answer in class?
She winged it.
What bat was called an invader?
Bat-talina.
Who were the original transformers? Vampire bats!
Why do psychiatrists study bats?
They want to learn about their hang-ups.
What do you get if you cross a bat with a ball?
A home run.
What happened when the bat swallowed the alarm-clock?
She turned into a ding-bat.
Where do bats keep their money? The blood bank!
What did the pastry cook say when he was making the cake?
Bat-a-cake. Bat-a-cake.
Why did the vampire need mouthwash? Because he had bat breath.
What praise did a bat’s friend deserve? A bat on the back.
What do you call vampires bats that cheer at football games?
Bat-on-twirlers.
What do you get if you cross a bat with a woodpecker?
Bat-a-tat.
How do you write a book about bats? With a ghostwriter.
What happened if vampires came to a big dance?
A bat ball.
How do you hold a bat?
By the wings.
What did the bat say to the friend who itched and squirmined?
Come back when you have washed out the virmin.
What did the bat complain about?
Flying with such frequency was exhausting.
Why did the bat fire a chauffeur?
He drove everyone batty.
How do bats greet a friend?
With a sound wave.
What do you get when you cross a bat with a doorbell?
A ding-bat.
What does a vampire bat call a bloodmobile?
Meals on Wheels.
Why don’t bats sleep like the rest of us?
They can't get the hang of it.
What did the pitcher tell the bat? Batter-up.
How do bats tell their future? They read their horrorscope.
What fruit do vampire bats like the best?
Neck-tarines.
Where do bats keep their money?
The blood bank.
What game do bats like to play with birds?
Bat-mington.
What did the bat say to the diabetic? Nice knawing you!
Why did the bat often use mouthwash? She had bat breath.
Did you hear about the two bats meeting? It was love at first bite!
What do you call a bat who gets a charge out of life?
A battery.
Why shouldn’t you drive with a vampire?
He will drive you batty.
Why did the bat walk in her pijamas to take a bath?
Because she did not have a bat robe.
What do you call a bat with the flu?
An airborne disease.
Why did the bat look for a job?
She was tired of hanging around.
What holiday do bats love best?
St. Bat-rich’s Day.
When does a bat go "mooooo"? When it is learning a new language!
Why did the bat break up with her girlfriend?
She thought she was a pain in the neck.
What did the grape say when the bat squished on it? Nothing, it just let out a little wine!
How fast can a cave become vacant? At the drop of a bat.
How do bats tell their future?
They read their horrors-cope.