"Most people work just hard enough to not get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit." ~ George Carline
"If all the rich people in the world divided up their money among themselves, there wouldn’t be enough to go around." ~ Christina Stead
“The safest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it in your pocket.” – Kin Hubbard
“There are two times in a man’s life when he should not speculate: when he can’t afford it, and when he can.” – Mark Twain
“Money and women are the most sought after and the least known about of any two things we have.”— Will Rogers
“What’s the use of happiness? It can’t buy you money.”- Henry Youngman
“Cocaine is God’s way of saying you’re making too much money.” – Robin Williams
“A father is someone who carries pictures in his wallet where his money used to be” — unknown
“Money can’t buy happiness, but it can buy you the kind of misery you prefer." ~Author Unknown
“There were times my pants were so thin I could sit on a dime and tell if it was heads or tails.” -Spencer Tracy quotes
“A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it.” – Bob Hope
“I’m so naive about finances. Once my mother mentioned an amount and I realized I didn’t understand, she had to explain, ‘That’s like three Mercedes.’ Then I understood.” – Brooke Shields
“If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.” – Earl Wilson
“If you think money doesn’t grow on trees, you ain’t checking every limb.” – Chamillionaire
“From birth to age 18, a girl needs good parents, from 18 to 35 she needs good looks, from 35 to 55 she needs a good personality, and from 55 on she needs cash.” – Sophie Tucker
"Men are like bank accounts. The more money, the more interest they generate." ~ Mark Twain
“If there is anyone to whom I owe money, I’m prepared to forget it if they are.” - Errol Flynn
“A fool and his money are lucky enough to get together in the first place.” — Gordon Gekko (Michael Douglas) Wall Street
“In this country, you gotta make the money first. Then when you get the money, you get the power. Then when you get the power, then you get the women.” –Tony Montana (Al Pacino) Scarface
“Blessed are the young, for they shall inherit the national debt." ~ Herbert Hoover
“My formula for success is rise early, work late and strike oil.” JP Getty.
“Money is not the most important thing in the world. Love is. Fortunately, I love money.” – Jackie Mason
“You fool! You’re 30 cents away from having a quarter!” –Sweet Dick Willie (Robin Harris)Do the Right Thing
“It’s money. I remember it from when I was single.” – Billy Crystal
"Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy." ~ Groucho Marx
“I’m tired of hearing about money, money, money, money, money. I just want to play the game, drink Pepsi, wear Reebok.” — Shaquille O’Neal
“Money and women. They’re two of the strongest things in the world. The things you do for a woman you wouldn’t do for anything else. Same with money.” — Satchel Paige
“If women didn’t exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning." ~Aristotle Onassis
"Car sickness is the feeling you get when the monthly payment is due." ~Author Unknown
“It’s money. I remember it from when I was single” — Billy Crystal
“No matter how hard you hug your money, it never hugs back.” — H. Jackson Brown Jr.
“A bargain is something you can’t use at a price you can’t resist.”- Franklin Jones.
“Someday I want to be rich. Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That’s how rich I want to be.” – Rita Rudner
“Money isn’t everything, but it’s a long way ahead of what comes next.” - Edmund Stockdale
“To make a million, start with $900,000.” - Morton Shulman.
“This would be a much better world if more married couples were as deeply in love as they are in debt” – Earl Wilson
“If you lend someone $20, and never see that person again, it was probably worth it." ~Author Unknown
“I’m stuck between “I need to save money.” and “You only live once.”” – Anonymous
"Money without brains is always dangerous." ~ Napoleon Hill
“If you pay peanuts, you get monkeys” – James Goldsmith
“Love conquers all things except poverty and toothache” – Mae West
“People are living longer than ever before, a phenomenon undoubtedly made necessary by the 30-year mortgage." ~Doug Larson
“Budget: a mathematical confirmation of your suspicions." ~A.A. Latimer
"There is a very easy way to return from a casino with a small fortune: go there with a large one." ~ Jack Yelton
“Money often costs too much.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson
“Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.” — Steven Wright
“We live by the Golden Rule. Those who have the gold make the rules." ~Buzzie Bavasi
“Before borrowing money from a friend, decide which you need most.” —Addison H. Hallock
"Too many people spend money they haven’t earned, to buy things they don’t want, to impress people they don’t like." ~ Will Smith
"They were a people so primitive they did not know how to get money, except by working for it." ~ Joseph Addison
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