“I owe much; I have nothing; the rest I leave to the poor.” - Francois Rebelais
“A fool and his money are lucky enough to get together in the first place.” — Gordon Gekko (Michael Douglas) Wall Street
“I just filled out my income tax forms. Who says you can’t get killed by a blank?” — Milton Berle
“If you think money doesn’t grow on trees, you ain’t checking every limb.” – Chamillionaire
“Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair." ~Sam Ewing
“My formula for success is rise early, work late and strike oil.” JP Getty.
“In this country, you gotta make the money first. Then when you get the money, you get the power. Then when you get the power, then you get the women.” –Tony Montana (Al Pacino) Scarface
“When people ask me if I have any spare change, I tell them I have it at home in my spare wallet.”-Nick Arnette
“I’m so naive about finances. Once my mother mentioned an amount and I realized I didn’t understand, she had to explain, ‘That’s like three Mercedes.’ Then I understood.” – Brooke Shields
“There are two times in a man’s life when he should not speculate: when he can’t afford it, and when he can.” – Mark Twain
"Whoever said money can’t buy happiness didn’t know where to go shopping." ~ Bo Derek
“Money is something you have to make in case you don’t die.” Max Asnas.
“The safest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it in your pocket.” – Kin Hubbard
"Dogs have no money. Isn’t that amazing? They’re broke their entire lives. But they get through. Do you know why dogs have no money? .. No Pockets." ~ Jerry Seinfeld
"I’ve done the calculation and your chances of winning the lottery are identical whether you play or not." ~ Fran Lebowitz
"If you can count your money, you don’t have a billion dollars." ~ J. Paul Getty
"I am having an out-of-money experience." ~ Anonymous
“It doesn’t matter how low the dollar will go, I will always bend down and pick it up.” ~ Anonymous
“You fool! You’re 30 cents away from having a quarter!” –Sweet Dick Willie (Robin Harris)Do the Right Thing
“Money is not the most important thing in the world. Love is. Fortunately, I love money.” – Jackie Mason
“There’s a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It’s called marriage” — James Holt McGavran
“What’s worth doing is worth doing for money.” –Gordon Gekko (Michael Douglas) Wall Street
"Most people work just hard enough to not get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit." ~ George Carline
“Income tax returns are the most imaginative fiction being written today." ~ Herman Wouk
“Money doesn’t solve all problems but it could solve my money problem.” – Anonymous
“Money’s only something you need in case you don’t die tomorrow." ~ Martin Sheen
"Staying in bed all day is my way of saving money." ~ Anonymous
“Money can’t buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery." ~ Spike Milligan
“People say money is not the key to happiness, but I have always figured if you have enough money, you can have a key made.”—Joan Rivers
“It doesn’t matter if you’re black or white… the only color that really matters is green.” – Family Guy
"The safe way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it in your pocket." ~ Kin Hubbard
“What’s the use of happiness? It can’t buy you money." ~ Henny Youngman
“The waste of money cures itself, for soon there is no more to waste." ~M.W. Harrison
“Money can’t buy happiness, but it can buy you the kind of misery you prefer." ~Author Unknown
“Love conquers all things except poverty and toothache” – Mae West
“All I ask is the chance to prove that money can’t make me happy.” Spike Milligan.
“Economists report that a college education adds many thousands of dollars to a man’s lifetime income – which he then spends sending his son to college.” — Bill Vaughn
“What’s your favorite childhood memory? Not paying bills.” – Anonymous
“If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.” – Earl Wilson
“I finally know what distinguishes man from other beasts: financial worries.” – Jules Renard
“If there is anyone to whom I owe money, I’m prepared to forget it if they are.” - Errol Flynn
“Carpe per diem – seize the check.” – Robin Williams.
“The economy depends about as much on economists as the weather does on weather forecasters." ~Jean-Paul Kauffmann
"Don’t stay in bed unless you make money in bed." ~ George Burns
“I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford. Then I want to move in with them.” —Phyllis Diller
“They say that love is more important, but have you ever tried to pay your bills with a hug?” – Anonymous
“People are living longer than ever before, a phenomenon undoubtedly made necessary by the 30-year mortgage." ~Doug Larson
"Ah, yes, divorce… A Latin word meaning to rip out a man’s genitals through his wallet." ~ Robin Williams
“A dollar picked up in the road is more satisfaction to us than the 99 which we had to work for, and the money won at Faro or in the stock market snuggles into our hearts in the same way. ~Mark Twain
"Do you have any idea how cheap stocks are? Wall Street is now being called Wall Mart Street." ~ Jay Leno
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