You look like my future ex wife.
Let’s make like a banana and split.
I think it would be hot if we f**ked other people. Exclusively.
Baby are you an angel? Because I'm a atheist.
Are you a parking ticket? Because you're evidence that I made a mistake.
I'm not gay but I'll learn.
Hey baby, you know what sounds good? You and me never speaking to each other again.
Hey baby, I think I'm going blind. Because I can't see you anymore.
Do those legs go all the way? Because you should use them to go away.
Hey girl, you must be a math book because you’re full of problems.
Did we fall from the sky? Because we look pretty broken up right now.
Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: you.
Hey baby, are you in a tunnel? Because we’re breaking up.
I will always cherish my initial misconceptions of you.
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Girl its been fun
But im leaving you
Hey girl, are you a newspaper?
Because there's a new issue with you every f**king day.
Is it hot in here or is this relationship suffocating me?
Girl, have we both been rendered sightless? Because we ain’t seeing each other anymore.
This relationship is kinda like the Superbowl LIII halftime show; I can’t wait for it to be over.
Knock knock. Who's there? You're - You're who? - You're single!
We must be a cast on a spiral fracture, girl. Because we’re on a serious break.
Hey, are you an anchor? Because you've done nothing but weigh me down.
They say one man's trash is another man's treasure. I hope you find someone who treasures you.
Hey, let's hold a costume party. You can be a bank, and I can be alone!
It’s a good thing we’re bad at puzzles because there is no way we’re putting this shit back together.
I think we need to become better strangers.
Hey, did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because honestly, Karen, you are a demon.
Sorry sweety, but I think I'm in love with your mom.
I expected some baggage with our relationship but I didn’t expect the cargo of the Titanic to come floating to the surface.
Are you dessert because I'm finished.
Are you a thief? Because you stole a year of my life.
Will you be the sun in my life? Then stay millions of miles away from me.
I think this has been said somewhere else.
We're donion rings.
Are you a fire alarm? because you are really freaking loud and annoying
Hey girl, are you a newspaper?
Because you get picked up by random guys on the bus.
Are you a dollar bill? Because you’re single.
Roses are red, violets are blue, trash is dumped and so are you.
Are you a fidget spinner? Because the last time I had fun with you was forever ago and I’m not really interested in touching you anymore. I’m pretty sure you were just a phase and now I’d really like to get you out of my house and forget it ever happened.
Dinosaurs represent our relationship, because they both don’t exist anymore.”
What’s the difference between me and your socks? I’m not yours anymore.
You remind me of Halley's Comet. I don't wanna see you again for another 74 years.
Hey babe, are you the Mcdonald's Ice Cream Machine, because you just aren't working for me anymore.
Are you a stop watch? Because our time is up.
Wanna see a magic trick? Abrakadabra, you're single now.
We should make like the Soviet Union and split up.
Hey baby are you American cheese because you come as a single now.
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