You remind me of Halley's Comet. I don't wanna see you again for another 74 years.
Will you be the sun in my life? Then stay millions of miles away from me.
I think this has been said somewhere else.
Hey babe, how about I plan a romantic weekend get away, and while I’m gone you can pack your shit and GTFO?
Damn girl, are you a magician’s assistant? Because I want you to disappear from my life.
Hey, remember back when we were a thing… Yeah… Good times.
I think we need to become better strangers.
There's something I've been wanting to say since the day we met. Goodbye.
You look like my future ex wife.
Are you a fire alarm? because you are really freaking loud and annoying
Excuse me, I seem to have lost my phone number, can you do the same?
Are you a dollar bill? Because you’re single.
Remember when I asked you out? Well, I was talking to the girl behind you.
Hey baby, remember how you said that you can’t live without me? Well, it’s time to get your affairs in order….
Wanna see a magic trick? Abrakadabra, you're single now.
Raise your hand if you have a boyfriend.
Not so fast
Hey girl, are you a newspaper?
Because there's a new issue with you every f**king day.
Baby are you an angel? Because I'm a atheist.
Hey girl, are you a newspaper?
Because you get picked up by random guys on the bus.
Are you a stop watch? Because our time is up.
Hey baby, are you in a tunnel? Because we’re breaking up.
What’s your sign? Mine is stop.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
My divorce attorney
Hey, let's hold a costume party. You can be a bank, and I can be alone!
Honey, I need you to cancel my subscription. I’m done with your issues.
Hey babe, I think its about time we cancel our gym membership. We're not working out anymore
I don’t know what I’d do without you, but starting tomorrow I’m going to give it a try.
Is it hot in here or is this relationship suffocating me?
This relationship is kinda like the Superbowl LIII halftime show; I can’t wait for it to be over.
Hey girl, you must be a math book because you’re full of problems.
Hey, are you an anchor? Because you've done nothing but weigh me down.
You’re the girl that everybody wants. Today is their lucky day.
Let’s make like an atom, and split.
Hey Pumpkin, I just wanted to say that I'm done with having Halloween every day.
Girl, have we both been rendered sightless? Because we ain’t seeing each other anymore.
It's not you...it's your taste in music.
I'm not gay but I'll learn.
Are you the dog? Because your shit’s all over the lawn.
Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: you.
Honey if I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put the letters "DON'T LOVE" in between I and U
What’s the difference between me and your socks? I’m not yours anymore.
We need to cover more ground so we should split up.
It’s a good thing we’re bad at puzzles because there is no way we’re putting this shit back together.
Do those legs go all the way? Because you should use them to go away.
Roses are red, violets are blue, trash is dumped and so are you.
You looked better when I was drunk.
Are you an astronaut? Because I need some space.
Hey, baby. I'm calling myself Han because you need to be Solo.
Whoa, Heaven must be missing an angel! Because you’re dead to me.
Hey baby are you American cheese because you come as a single now.
Girl you're looking like a snack and I'm going on a diet.
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