We're donion rings.
You looked better when I was drunk.
I really like you. So does my wife.
Hey, did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Because honestly, Karen, you are a demon.
Raise your hand if you have a boyfriend.
Not so fast
Roses are red
Violets are blue
You made my life a mess
Please call a clean-up crew
Baby are you an angel? Because I'm a atheist.
Are you dessert because I'm finished.
If you take the "L" out of LOVER. Its OVER.
Here, look at this blank piece of paper for a second… I wrote every reason why we should stick together on it.
Do you believe in love at first sight? How about misery after three years?
I think it would be hot if we f**ked other people. Exclusively.
Aside from being single, what do you do for a living?
You look like my future ex wife.
Knock knock. Who's there? You're - You're who? - You're single!
Girl, If you were a fruit you'd be a can't-elope.
We must be a cast on a spiral fracture, girl. Because we’re on a serious break.
Girl, have we both been rendered sightless? Because we ain’t seeing each other anymore.
Will you be the sun in my life? Then stay millions of miles away from me.
I think this has been said somewhere else.
Our relationship is like my financial status: Broke.
Are you a New Years resolution? Because we stopped working out after the first two weeks
Dinosaurs represent our relationship, because they both don’t exist anymore.”
Hey girl, are you a newspaper?
Because you get picked up by random guys on the bus.
What’s the difference between me and your socks? I’m not yours anymore.
Hey baby, remember how you said that you can’t live without me? Well, it’s time to get your affairs in order….
I think we need to become better strangers.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I'd rather be dead than continue seeing you!
Hey, remember back when we were a thing… Yeah… Good times.
Is it hot in here or is this relationship suffocating me?
The Best Break Up Lines
Want to know a joke? Our relationship.
Honey if I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put the letters "DON'T LOVE" in between I and U
Wanna see a magic trick? Abrakadabra, you're single now.
It's time to be like a kit-kat and split up.
Hey babe do you need crutches? Cause I can’t stand you anymore.
Hey, are you an anchor? Because you've done nothing but weigh me down.
We should make like your parents and split.
Hey, let's hold a costume party. You can be a bank, and I can be alone!
Hey baby, you know what sounds good? You and me never speaking to each other again.
Hey babe, I think its about time we cancel our gym membership. We're not working out anymore
They say one man's trash is another man's treasure. I hope you find someone who treasures you.
Hey Pumpkin, I just wanted to say that I'm done with having Halloween every day.
Let’s make like a banana and split.
Hey baby are you American cheese because you come as a single now.
Hey babe, how about I plan a romantic weekend get away, and while I’m gone you can pack your shit and GTFO?
Knock knock.
Who's there?
My divorce attorney
Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: you.
Hear that sound? (cup hand to ear) Yep- that's a dump truck, and it's coming for you!
Dang girl, are you an angel? Because you are dead to me.
Roses are red, violets are blue, trash is dumped and so are you.
Girl you're looking like a snack and I'm going on a diet.
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