What did the duck who learned physics say?
Quark, quark.
Why does a duck say quack?
Because it can’t say moo.
Why did the duck detective get the key to the city?
Because he quacked the case.
What Do You Call A Clever Duck?
A wise quacker
Why did the duck go to the bank?
Because he wanted to get a new bill.
What do you call a bird that can fix anything?
Duck Tape.
Why did the duck cross the road?
Because there was a quack in the sidewalk.
How do you make a duck sing soul music?
Put him in the microwave until his Bill Withers
What do get if you cross a duck and Santa?
A Christmas Quacker.
Why are ducks bad drivers?
Their windshields are qwacked.
Where did the duck go when he was sick? A:
To the ducktor.
At What Time Does A Duck Wake Up?
At the quack of dawn.
What Do Ducks Have With Soup?
Quackers
Why did the duck cross the road?
He was tied to the chicken.
What did the duck say when he dropped the dishes?
“I hope I didn’t quack any.”
What did the drug diller say to the duck?
Are you on quack?
What says “Quick, Quick”?
A duck with the hiccups
How Do Ducks Talk?
They don't, you quack.
Did You Hear About The Duck Who Thought He Was a Squirrel?
It was one tough nut to quack.
What did the duck eat for snack?
Salted Quackers.
What do ducks watch on TV?
Duck-umentaries.
Did you hear about the bird that couldn’t pass environmental legislation?
He was a lame duck.
What Do You Call Two Ducks And A Cow?
Quakers and milk.
What did the duck say when he bought lipstick?
"Put it on my bill."
What Do You Call A Duck That Steals?
A robber ducky.
Did You Hear About The Duck With A Drug Problem?
He was a quackhead.
What did a duck say to the comedian?
You quack me up.
What Do You Call A Cat That Swallows A Duck?
A duck-filled-fatty-pus
What do ducks get after they eat?
A bill.
Which side of a duck has the most feathers?
The outside.
What do you get when you put four ducks in a box?
A box of quackers.
How do you get down off a horse?
You don’t, you get down off a duck.
What did the duck say when the waitress came?
Put it on my bill.
What do you get when a duck bends over?
It’s Buttquack
What did the duck do after he read all these jokes?
He quacked up.
What happens when a duck flies upside down?
It quacks up
Why don`t ducks tell jokes when they fly?
Because they would quack up.
What did Detective Duck say to his partner?
“Let’s quack this case.”
What do you call a duck with fangs?
Count Duckula.
What Did The Duck Say When The Waitress Came?
Put it on my bill!
Top 25 Funniest Duck Names:
1. James Pond
2. Quack Sparrow
3. Duck Norris
4 Quacks-a-Lot
5 Quackhead
6 Quacko
7. Quackers
8. Nutquacker
9. Quacker Jack
10. Quack Efron
11. Quack Black
12. Moby Duck
13. Quackula
14. Sir Duckington
15. Eggbert
16. Quackers
17. Duckleberry Finn
18. Quacker Jack
19. Lucky Duck
20. Cheese and quackers
21. Quaker Jack
22. Duckingham Palace
23.Waddles
24. Quackie Chan
25 Firequacker
Why Was The Teacher Annoyed With The Duck?
Because he wouldn't quit quackin' jokes!