What do chickens grow on?
Eggplants.
What happened to the baby chicken that misbehaved at school?
It was egg-spelled.
Why does a chicken coop have two doors?
Because if had four doors it would be a chicken sedan.
Why can’t a rooster ever get rich?
Because he works for chicken feed.
What do you call a chicken that crosses the road, rolls in the dirt, crosses the road again, and then rolls in the dirt again?
A dirty double-crossing chicken.
Why did the T-Rex cross the road?
Because the chicken hadn’t evolved yet.
Why did the chicken cross the road halfway?
She wanted to lay it on the line.
I don't agree with battery hens.
Surely they'd lay bigger eggs if they were plugged into the mains.
Why did the chicken join a band?
Because it already had drumsticks.
Did you hear about the chicken who could only lay eggs in the winter?
She was no spring chicken.
What kind tree grows chickens?
Poultry.
What do chickens study in school?
Eggonomics.
What do you get if you feed gunpowder to a chicken?
An egg-splosion.
How long do chickens work?
Around the cluck.
Why do chickens lay eggs?
Because if they dropped them, they’d break.
What did one chicken say to the other after they walked through poison ivy?
“You scratch my beak and I’ll scratch yours!”
Why did the chicken stop in the middle of the road?
Because it wanted to lay it on the line.
What do you get when you cross a ghost with a chicken?
A poultry-geist.
What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?
A brick layer.
I ate an omelette for breakfast…
but I’m still feeling peckish.
Is chicken soup good for your health?
Not if you’re the chicken.
When the farmer died, all his chickens were sold to the highest bidder.
They would have preferred to stay on the farm, but auctions speak louder than birds.
Which chicken is at the top of the pecking order?
Attila the Hen.
Why do chickens rinse their mouth out with soap?
Because of all the fowl language.
How do you know if it’s too hot in the chicken barn?
The chickens are laying hard-cooked eggs.
What did the baby chicken say when he saw his mother sitting on an orange?
Dad, look what marma-laid!
What do you get when a chicken lays an egg on top of a barn?
An eggroll.
How do you know if it's too hot in the chicken barn?
The chickens are laying hard-boiled eggs.
What do chickens grow on?
Eggplants.
Why is it easy for chicks to talk?
Because talk is cheep.