Who is a polar bear’s favorite musician?
Seal.
What does Pooh Bear call his girl friend?
Hunny.
What do you call a bear with no arms and no legs?
An ambulance. This is no time for jokes.
Why did the bear dissolve in water?
It was polar.
How does a bear get from one place to another?
On a bear-o-plane.
What do you get if you cross a grizzly bear and a harp?
A bear-faced lyre.
What color socks do bears wear?
They don’t wear socks, they have bear feet.
Why didn’t the teddy bear want any dessert?
He was already stuffed.
What does pooh eat at parties?
Blue bear-y pie.
Where do the teenaged polar bears go to dance?
To the snow-ball.
What do you call a cemetery for bears?
Bearial grounds.
Why didn’t the baby leave his momma?
Because he couldn’t bear it!
What do you call a Mexican bear with a rubber toe?
Robearto.
What is a polar bear’s favorite food?
Iceberg lettuce and snow peas.
Where do polar bears keep their money?
In a snow bank.
What is a bear’s favorite drink?
Koka-Koala.
Why didn’t the teddy bear eat his lunch?
Because he was stuffed.
What do grizzlies use in the shower?
Bear conditioner.
Why did the two bears break up at the North Pole?
They were polar opposites.
What did the bear say when her date showed up too early?
I’ll be out in a minute, I’m bearly dressed.
What do you call bears with no ears?
B.
Why do bears have fur coats?
Because they look silly wearing jackets.
How can you tell when a polar bear is moving?
There’s a “fur sale” sign in the yard.
What do you call a bear who practices dentistry?
A molar bear.
What is a polar bear’s favorite snack?
Brrrrrittos.
What do you call a freezing bear?
A brrrrrrr.
Why do grizzlies never look sad?
Because whenever there’s a problem, they just grin and bear it.
What do you call a bear without any teeth?
A gummy bear.
What do you call a polar bear in Florida?
A solar bear.
Have you ever had a dream about a bear eating you?
I call them bite-mares.