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Box

There was an Old Man on some rocks,
Who shut his wife up in a box;
When she said, 'Let me out!'
He exclaimed, 'Without doubt,
You will pass all your life in that box.'
The Special Gift
The Special Gift On the last day of kindergarten, all the children brought presents for their teacher. The florist's son handed the teacher a gift. She shook it, held it up and said, "I bet I know what it is - it's some flowers!" "That's right!" shouted the little boy. Then the candy store owner's daughter handed the teacher a gift. She held it up, shook it and said. "I bet I know what it is - it's a box of candy!" "That's right!" shouted the little girl. The next gift was from the liquor store owner's son, Little Johnny. The teacher held it up and saw that it was leaking. She touched a drop with her finger and tasted it. "Is it wine?" she asked. "No," Little Johnny answered. The teacher touched another drop to her tongue. "Is it champagne?" she asked. "No," he answered. Finally, the teacher said, "I give up. What is it?" Little Johnny replied, "A puppy!"
What's worse than finding a Justin Bieber CD in your boyfriend's bedroom? Finding a box of tissues next to it.
What is a vagina? The box a penis comes in.
What does a woman and Kentucky Fried Chicken have in common? By the time you're finished with the breast and thighs, all you have left is the greasy box to put your bone in.
How many dinosaurs can fit in an empty box ? One . After that, the box isn't empty anymore!
Crazy ex-girlfriends are like a box of chocolates.
They'll kill your dog.
There was a young lady from the Azores
Whose box was all covered with sores
And the dogs in the street
Wouldn’t bark at the meat
that hung in festoons from her drawers.
A blond calls her mom...
Blond: "Mom mom!! I'm a genius!"
Mother: "Really dear? How's that possible?"
Blond: "I finished a puzzle that I've been working on for 1 year and on the box it said 'for 2-5 yrs'."
I may not have gotten your virginity, but can I at least have the box it came in?
When the defender was put in the box for spearing Jaromir Jagr, he
complained "but it was only a poke-Czech!"
What do you get when you put four ducks in a box?
A box of quackers.
Einstein, Newton, and Pascal decide to play hide-and-seek. Einstein is "It," closes his eyes, counts to 10, and then opens them. Pascal is nowhere to be seen. Newton is sitting right in front of Einstein, with a piece of chalk in his hand. He's sitting in a box drawn on the ground, a meter to one side. Einstein says, "Newton, you're terrible, I've found you!" Newton says, "No no, no. You've found one Newton per square meter. You've found Pascal!"
My son's asked for a strange Christmas present this year. It's really cheap though so I don't mind.
I'm not sure why he wants an eggs box though.
It’s time to think outside the pizza box.
A detective was interviewing the victim of an assault.
The victim described the assailant as a leather box with a handle on it. The culprit was arrested 30 minutes later.
It was a brief case.
The Secret Box
The Secret Box An elderly pastor was searching in his closet for his collar before church one Sunday morning. In the back of the closet, he found a small box containing three eggs and 100 $1 bills. He called his wife into the closet to ask her about the box and its contents. Embarrassed, she admitted to having hidden the box there for their entire 30 years of marriage. Disappointed and hurt, the pastor asked her, "Why?" The wife replied that she hadn't wanted to hurt his feelings. He asked her how the box could have hurt his feelings. She said that every time during their marriage that he had delivered a poor sermon, she had placed an egg in the box. The pastor felt that three poor sermons in 30 years was certainly nothing to feel bad about, so he asked her what the $100 was for. She replied, "Each time I got a dozen eggs, I sold them to the neighbors for a dollar."