“Summer bachelors like summer breezes, are never as cool as they pretend to be.”
– Nora Ephron
“Failure is the condiment that gives success its flavor.”
― Truman Capote
"Alcohol may be man's worst enemy but the Bible says to love your enemy."
- Frank Sinatra
"The word aerobics came about when the gym instructors got together and said, 'If we're going to charge $10 an hour, we can't call it jumping up and down'" - Rita Rudner
“I think every kid thinks their dad is goofy.”
- Judd Apatow.
“Any intelligent woman who reads the marriage contract, and then goes into it, deserves all the consequences.” — Isadora Duncan
"The happiest marriage I can picture would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman." — Samuel Taylor Coleridge
"If love is the answer, could you please re-phrase the question?"
- Lily Tomlin
“Winter is like fall except you need five pairs of leggings instead of one.”
“One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one’s work is terribly important.” — Bertrand Russell
“How do I like my eggs? In a cake.”
― Unknown
“If Patrick Henry thought that taxation without representation was bad, he should see how bad it is with representation.”
– Farmer’s Almanac
“Properly trained, a man can be dog’s best friend.”
- Corey Ford.
"The world is divided into people who do things–and people who get the credit."
~ Dwight Morrow
"The closer you are to nature the further you are from idiots.”
“Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected.” – Red Buttons
"Yoga is a way of getting totally drunk – not on alcohol but on life."
- Sadhguru
“Marriage is not just spiritual communion; it is also remembering to take out the trash.”—Joyce Brothers
“Only your real friends will tell you when your face is dirty.”
— Sicilian Proverb
"I don't think jogging is healthy, especially morning jogging. If morning joggers knew how tempting they looked to morning motorists, they would stay home and do sit-ups."
Rita Rudner
“After a good dinner, one can forgive anybody, even one’s own relations.” —Oscar Wilde
“When your mother asks, ‘Do you want a piece of advice?’ it is a mere formality. It doesn’t matter if you answer yes or no. You’re going to get it anyway.”—Erma Bombeck
“One of the keys to a successful marriage is separate bathrooms. When he enters my bathroom sometimes, I’m like, ‘Why are you in here?’ And he’s like, ‘I live here. Can I enjoy my bathroom too?’”—Michelle Obama
"The devil himself had probably redesigned hell in the light of information he had gained from observing airport layouts."
- Anthony Price
"I’ve done the calculation and your chances of winning the lottery are identical whether you play or not." ~ Fran Lebowitz
"Old age comes at a bad time." – San Banducci
“The learned fool writes his nonsense in better language than the unlearned, but still ‘this nonsense.”
– Benjamin Franklin
"If you want to read about love and marriage, you’ve got to buy two separate books." — Alan King
"The man who says his wife can't take a joke, forgets that she took him." — Oscar Wilde
“Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.” —Phyllis Diller
"In the family sandwich, the older people and the younger ones can recognize one another as the bread. Those in the middle are, for a time, the meat." - Anna Quindlen
“The Government that robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend upon the support of Paul.”
– George Bernard Shaw
"My wife gets all the money I make. I just get an apple and clean clothes every morning."
- Ray Romano
“Friends are people who know you really well and like you anyway.”
— Greg Tamblyn
“To keep your marriage brimming, with love in the wedding cup, whenever you’re wrong, admit it; whenever you’re right, shut up.”—Ogden Nash.
"Parents don’t really go on holidays. They just look after their kids in a different country for a while."
"I orchestrate my mornings to the tune of coffee."
– Terri Guillemets
“A cat is a puzzle for which there is no solution.”
- Hazel Nicholson.
"I really don't think I need buns of steel. I'd be happy with buns of cinnamon."
— Ellen DeGeneres
"Marriage is like a bank account. You put it in, you take it out, you lose interest."
- Professor Irwin Corey
“If owl parties aren't called hootenannies, this world will never make sense again."
- Reverend Badger
“Be like a postage stamp. Stick to a thing till you get there.” — Josh Billings
"True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked." — Erich Segal
“Best Friend: One million memories, ten thousand inside jokes, one hundred shared secrets.”
— Unknown
“When your mother asks, ‘Do you want a piece of advice?’ it is a mere formality. It doesn’t matter if you answer yes or no. You’re going to get it anyway.”
Erma Bombeck
“If we’re not meant to have midnight snacks, why is there a light in the fridge?”
― Unknown
"I was a vegetarian until I started leaning towards sunlight."
- Rita Rudner
"I bought an ant farm. I don't know where I am going to get a tractor that small!"
- Steven Wright
“Your typical six-year-old is a paradoxical little person.”
- Louise Bates Ames.
"I refuse to admit I’m more than fifty-two, even if that does make my sons illegitimate." - Nancy Astor
Go to BabaMail
