There’s only one thing I want to change about you, and that’s your last name.
Are you a booger? Because I want to pick you first.
Are you an orphanage? Cause I wanna give you kids.
Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Also Did you utilize Canada's public healthcare system to help ease that pain?
Baby, I'm a dependent clause, and all I need is you.
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Dewey.
Dewey who?
Dewey have to use a condom?
I'm willing to lower my standards if you're going on a date with me.
On a scale from 1 to 10, you're a 9... And I'm the 1 you need.
According to Newton’s law of universal gravitation, If I’m attracted to you, then you’re attracted to me.
Sorry sweety, but I think I'm in love with your mom.
If I told you that you had a great body, would you hold it against me?
You stole my heart, so can I steal your last name?
I’m diagnosing you to see if you’d make a good boyfriend.
Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put you between F and CK
Woman: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put you before GLY
I need a date; do you know where I could find one?
Look into my compound eyes and say you'll eat our young.
What took you so long? I've been Kuwait-ing for you my whole life.
I can score more often than the average soccer player.
Excuse me. I'm from the FBI, the Fine Body Investigators, and I'm going to have to ask you to assume the position.
Man: Do you work at the Bakery, cause you have a nice set of buns.
Woman: Do you work at a Grocery store? Then why are you checking me out?
When I log my run in my journal today, it will say I ran with my future wife today.
Could you tell me the oxidation state of this atom and your phone number?
Are you wearing space pants? Because your a** is out of this world.
I’ve got my ion you, baby.
I don't have a Christmas list, cuz you're already the best gift.
Are you a cat? Because you're purrrrrfect.
Hey girl, are you related to Abraham's nephew?
Because I like you a LOT.
Your eyes are as blue as toilet water.
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Tex.
Tex who?
Tex two to tango.
One night I looked up at the stars and thought, ‘Wow, how beautiful.’ But now that I’m looking at you, nothing else can compare.
You are more precious than my blue suede shoes
Is your name Sunshine? Because you are “In my soul today”.
My ex-girlfriend is like the square root of -1,.... she's imaginary.
I wasn’t sure if I should make the first move… but I was raised to never Jack down from an opportunity
I think you just tripped me, 'cause I just fell for you.
It’s a good thing we’re bad at puzzles because there is no way we’re putting this shit back together.
You dropped something. My jaw.
Wanted to use a cheesy pickup line but toBrianna-st with you, I think puns are sort of ovedone
You’re so beautiful, you make me feel like an arpeggiated chord… broken.
Are you a trampoline? Because I want to bounce on you.
I wish I was Tim Horton's coffee…So I could get close to your lips.
Are you doing Ananda Balasana, or are you just happy to see me, baby?
Driftin with an attractor like you, baby, is always 'drag free'.
You must be a fourth or a fifth, because you're just perfect!
I'm sorry I had an accident...
I slipped and fell right into your heart.
Are you Darth Vader, because I wouldn't mind if you used a little force to choke me.
If I could rewrite the alphabet, I would P on U.
Call me a winner because it looks like I’ve won the Sophie
It's always a first class trip with me.
If a flower grew every time you’d cross my mind, I’d have a field of flowers.
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