"If more of us valued food and cheer and song above hoarded gold, it would be a merrier world."
– J.R.R. Tolkien
“Some people can eat anything they want and stay slim. I put on weight just by reading the recipe.”
― Unknown
“My mind says ‘abs’ but my heart says ‘cheese fries’.”
― Unknown
“Those pizzas I ate were for medicinal purposes.”
― Amy Neftzger
“The only thing I like better than talking about food is eating.”
— John Walters
“There’s no “we” in ice cream.”
― Unknown
"A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand."
— Barbara Johnson
“Being a beaver is nice, if you’re hungry you just eat a piece of your home.”
― Unknown
“A party without a cake is really just a meeting.”
― Julia Child
"Snack time heals all wounds."
— Bridger Winegar
"Americans will eat garbage provided you sprinkle it liberally with ketchup."
— Henry James
“I didn’t get this physique by not eating tacos.”
― Jon Tester
"We must have a pie. Stress cannot exist in the presence of a pie."
– David Mamet
"If we shake out all of the crumbs from all of the keyboards in the world, we can end world hunger."
— Matthew Dolkart
“When life hands you lemons, give them back. You deserve chocolate.”
― Unknown
"Without ice cream, there would be darkness and chaos."
– Don Kardong
“Another day, another 13,000 calories.”
— Andy Lassner
"I was a vegetarian until I started leaning toward the sunlight."
– Rita Rudner
“If we’re not meant to have midnight snacks, why is there a light in the fridge?”
― Unknown
"The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found."
— Calvin Trillin
“Pizza is like the entire food pyramid!”
― Madeline Oles
"I would like to find a stew that will give me heartburn immediately, instead of at three o'clock in the morning."
– John Barrymore
"You can tell a lot about a fellow's character by his way of eating jelly beans."
— Ronald Reagan
"I'll have a double cappuccino, half-caf, non-fat milk, with enough foam to be aesthetically pleasing, but not so much that it would leave a mustache."
— Niles Crane
"Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon."
— Doug Larson
“Love and sausage are alike. Can never have enough of either.”
— Trixie Koontz
"Never trust a skinny cook."
– Iain Hewitson
"When the waitress asked if I wanted my pizza cut into four or eight slices, I said, 'Four. I don't think I can eat eight."
— Yogi Berra
“I’m glad I don’t have to hunt my own food, I don’t even know where sandwiches live.”
― Unknown
"My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people."
— Orson Welles
“Your body is not a temple, it’s an amusement park. Enjoy the ride.”
― Anthony Bourdain
"An onion can make people cry but there's never been a vegetable that can make people laugh."
— Will Rogers
"Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education."
— Mark Twain
"Life is too short for self-hatred and celery sticks."
– Marilyn Wann
“When you are stressed you eat ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets because stressed spelled backward is desserts.”
― Unknown
“Everything goes better with tacos.”
― Rachel Caine
“I always carry a knife in my purse, just in case we’re having cake.”
― Unknown
"Fish is the only food that is considered spoiled once it smells like what it is."
— P. J. O'Rourke
"I am not a glutton – I am an explorer of food."
– Erma Bombeck
"Never eat more than you can lift."
— Miss Piggy
“Little known fact, gentlemen. Tacos are the food of genius.”
― Heather Brewer
“Nutrition labels should include a “What if I ate the whole thing” section.”
― Unknown
"The trouble with eating Italian food is that, five or six days later, you're hungry again."
– George Miller
“Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the Titanic who waved off the dessert cart.”
― Erma Bombeck
“All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.”
― Charles M. Schulz
"I've been on a diet for two weeks and all I've lost is two weeks."
— Totie Fields
"I'm not sure what makes pepperoni so good if it's the pepper or the oni."
— Ulrik Stephens
"The only time to eat diet food is while you're waiting for the steak to cook."
— Julia Child
"The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not."
— Mark Twain
"Watermelon - it's a good fruit. You eat, you drink, you wash your face."
— Enrico Caruso